Re: Hey heterosexual radfems, how do you date men?

(liesarenotacceptance)
I don't date. It's much better for my emotional and physical health. I'm not lonely. I have friends. I have a dog. I have Netflix. At this point I'm so used to being in control of my own home, body, and time, I think trying to date someone who's been socialized his whole life to expect me to be his damn servant would just annoy the Hell out of me.

(atasheep)
Not straight but I’d guess they pick the least worse or something? Besides those who think they boyfriend is different from all men.

(womenopausal)
I don't. Since the porn explosion, I haven't found a man who can fuck worth a damn and I don't need one for anything else.

(PaleCornflowerBlue)
Dating radfem is an oxymoron. As you've already pointed out all men are dangerous and you have to be constantly on guard and expect them to do some shit. Ie you waste a ton of emotional recourses to just be with a man, and wasting recourses on men and risking yourself is not really what radfem teaches you.

You're not "doomed" to be alone. Loneliness is not painful if you have female friends and see a person and friend in yourself. We're taught that we're nothing without men, that we're incomplete without relationship, that we're worthless if no one loves us in a dick way. Those are all lies to keep us depending on men. There are plenty other ways to bring excitement into your life that don't involve men

(ExternalBid)
I agree with this. Dating/being in a relationship with/ marrying men are not feminist decisions. They can be choices that can improve your personal happiness but to try to reconcile them with feminism is futile imo

(gendercriticalonly)
I don’t anymore. I did for many years, and the power imbalance always came out, the expectations and such like. I decided that I wasn’t sufficiently bothered to compromise on this (I like my own company, I have friends and family, I enjoy doing things alone). If I came across someone, and we hit it off, great. Otherwise, it’s not something I want that badly.

I know exactly one man in a relationship with a woman who seems to just act like a person in a relationship with another person, no politics or manipulation or threats to sense of identity or domestic ineptitude or whatever. He’s a grown up, and he just gets on with things when they need to be done, and he supports his wife and loves his children and supports and encourages them without respect to gender. One man. Out of every one I know.

So it’s possible, but I wouldn’t hold my breath.

(StunningGift)
I've never dated a man and I'm worried about what would happen when I try. I learned that I'm still susceptible to manipulation by men, but I'm thankful it's only a friendship that I'm in and not a relationship because I'm not sure if I'd be able to quit it without being hurt first.

I know some women who take chances to date men, and even my 50yo mother hasn't learned all men are out to disappoint, manipulate and abuse. I'm not even sure how she justifies her choice at this point.