In some ways my situation is the same.
My husband of 20 years was arrested in 2016 of child porn. Not small children 15, 16, 17 year old. He has no interest in a "live" person or so I am told.
While many of these girls chose to have the picture taken or the act recorded and then post it on the internet they are the victims.
In the mean time my life and my children's have been turned upside down.
I realize this was a choice he made and that makes it harder for us.

My counselor told me once that "we are the forgotten victims" and we are.
These men are not thinking of their spouse or children when they do it. At that moment they don't care about the repercussions if they are caught and what it will do to their families.
The girls, they don't give a damn about us. The willing ones have only one goal in mind and will do anything to achieve it. I am not excusing the men in this!
The law they are not concerned with us. They only want to get convictions. to show the world how tough they are on crime and how concerned they are with the victims.

So yes, we are the victims that no one cares about!