Now we will see how Satan substituted the filthy pigsty goddess Circe or Cybele for the King of Kings. Around 325 A.D. a new "jesus' began to appear with long hair and effeminate features.
At the time of Pope Constantine, a new effeminate "jesus" began to appear with long hair.
This was not the Jesus of the Bible who defeated Satan and ALL the hosts of hell.
The REAL Jesus of the Bible did not have long hair. St. Paul said that it was a SHAME for a man to have long hair:
"Doth not even nature itself teach you, that, if a man have long hair, it is a shame unto him?" (I Cor. 11:14).
St. John, in the book of Revelation, describes a destroying army of the demons of hell and they ALL have LONG hair:
"And they (demons) had hair as the hair of women, and their teeth were as the teeth of lions" (Rev. 9:8).
Satan, through his Circe of Rome, seeks to turn all men into PIGS!!
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St. John, in the book of Revelation, describes a destroying army of the demons of hell and they ALL have LONG hair:
"And they (demons) had hair as the hair of women, and their teeth were as the teeth of lions" (Rev. 9:8)
Um... Rev 9:7 says "The locusts looked like horses prepared for battle. On their heads they wore something like crowns of gold, and their faces resembled human faces."
Not demons at all, you liar!
Yanno, I think a lot of this hatred of hair, especially on women, is because men go bald, and women normally don't.
I would wager many of the writers of these 'holy books' were pissed off because they lost their hair. Makes about as much sense as their insane ramblings.
The REAL Jesus of the Bible did not have long hair.
The real Jesus also didn't walk around in 15th century Tuscany, either, like he does in Italian Renaissance paintings. Many artists depicted religious scenes in contemporary settings, rather than trying to be historically accurate. If the men of the times wore long hair, Jesus was shown with long hair. If they wore short hair, he had short hair.
The worst pictures are those tacky, maudlin Victorian chromos typically found in modern illustrated kindergarten Bible story books, that show him looking like some sort of long-haired, white, blue eyed Viking. That's where guys like Niall usually get their religious information.
Based on the Fayum paintings of Semitic people around the time Jesus lived, I'd guess his hair was shaggy but not long, although Jewish dress may have been different.
image
So Jesus was a Hippie, and you hate Hippies, so... long hair must be an abomination!
If I weren't such a peaceful type, I'd probably want this guy to DIAF.
Scratch that. He deserves to DIAF.
"Satan, through his Circe of Rome, seeks to turn all men into PIGS!"
""Doth not even nature itself teach you, that, if a man have long hair, it is a shame unto him?""
NO! No, it doesn't. What the hell is unnatural about long hair?
Do animals cut their own hair?
What ... WHAT THE FUCK PAUL??
Plus, wasn't that Samson's thingy? His hair?
The fundies sure have been begging for this one all day.
fact: Jesus is the only major character in the Bible who never begat anything.
These facts lead to two conclusions. Jesus was gay and his "fag hating", alleged, father punished him.
This would also explain the anti-homosexual rantings of the Psycho-Christians. I imagine that discovering one's savior is a lisping, sway-hipped, limp-wristed, promiscuous (12 disciples!), sissy would cause some anger. And, since these wackos believe they will go to Hell for renouncing Mary's Nancy-boy they feel compelled to worship what they most despise. No wonder they're all nuts.
Unfortunately, Niall, your cult is much like your post - a mishmash of Greek, Roman, Jewish and Christian mythologies.
Get with it, man. It's the 21st Century, after all.
Paul wasn't talking about hair; he was talking about whether or not it was appropriate to pray with one's head covered. Made sense in a Jewish context, but when later Christians tried translating things, they fumbled around with possible meanings until they decided he must have been talking about how their own culture considered hair lengths to be a proper marker of gender.
"and then Jesus did take out his shot gun and declaired "hear me, long haired girlyman demons, for I shalt now kick thy unholy ass" and thus the lord Jesus did open a can of whoop ass upon all the commie pinko sissy ass long haired demons of hell..."
So Jesus had an Army buzzcut back in the day?
No. Most people had long hair... because, if I recall correctly, they didn't really give too much of a shit about having long hair, and they didn't have neat little barbershops on the corner, either.
Paul was likely retarded so it's not really worth an argument. Jesus was never painted in life and any pictures of him are only conjecture of what such a person might have looked like at the time. It's not even all that likely he ever existed, but there probably was at least a model for the most common portrayal of Jesus somewhere in history. In fact, I kinda wonder who that is.
They say women mustn't have short or cropped hair because it isn't "feminine" enough. Yet long hair is a "shame" and the bible says women must cover it. Damned if you do, damned if you don't.
Balls to it. Let's go bald!
"Satan, through his Circe of Rome, seeks to turn all men into PIGS!!"
No, that was the Daleks.
Which is an easy mistake to make since they are usually pretty much indistinguishable from the Jesus that the Fundies seem to worship. Left Behind Jesus might not have had the funny lights blinking on his head when he spoke, but he was all about the EXTERMINATE.
Wasn't there also a website called Way of the Master somewhere? Doctor Who works with everything...[/geek]
1. Circe and Cybele were two different Greek goddesses...read some Greek mythology, will ya?
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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