Wives ARE to submit to their husbands and be obedient them. Husbands are put in authority over their wives. In turn, the husband is to love the wife as Christ loves the Church. Of course husbands are not perfect and have their own flaws. A wife is supposed to be his help-meet, though and offer her own counsel in daily situations. It is not the wife's place to be the spiritual leader of the home, nor should the responsibility of providing for the household fall on her shoulders. Her congregation is her children and her pulpit the kitchen table. She should focus her preaching to the children, not her husband. All the time spent controlling him would be much better spent in prayer. I don't understand why so many women want to be so free of authority in their lives. If you have a problem with obeying your husband, than it's possible that your real beef is with God, since that is the way He designed it all to begin with.