[fundie + conspiracy combo.]
I know this sounds paranoid but what if let's say a group of people decided they wanted to do something big, something huge even, let's say they wanted to metaphorically kill God by destroying Religion I mean have you ever noticed that there far more atheists on the internet than you see in real life? were you a Christian when you first started surfing the internet browsing message boards and what not? are you now? have you ever doubted your Religion based on comments atheists have said? bottom line what if all that is a conspiracy? and if you're wondering what this has to do with this article than what if they could use the same methods they use to get you to buy something to turn into an atheist?
33 comments
I know this sounds paranoid but what if let's say a group of people decided they wanted to do something big, something huge even, let's say they wanted to metaphorically kill God by estamlishing a theocracy I mean have you ever noticed that there far more fundies on the internet than you see in real life? were you normal when you first started surfing the internet browsing message boards and what not? are you now? have you ever doubted reality based on comments fundies have said? bottom line what if all that is a conspiracy? and if you're wondering what this has to do with this article than what if they could use the same methods they use to get you to buy something to turn into a fundie?
Fixed.
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"I know this sounds paranoid"
Everytime I see something starting with this, I grab the popcorn and wait for the ride to begin.
"were you a Christian when you first started surfing the internet browsing message boards and what not?"
Yes.
"are you now?"
No, and I have no regrets.
We can kill God by destroying Religion? Damn, and I just bought a bunch of iron chariots.
have you ever noticed that there far more atheists on the internet than you see in real life?
Because we don't have big A's tattooed on our foreheads.
have you ever doubted your Religion based on comments atheists have said?
Your faith is that weak is it?
what if they could use the same methods they use to get you to buy something to turn into an atheist?
Buy Heinz Ketchup and you won't need God!
A little off topic, but why are they so pissed at Heinz this week?
Thanks to wise parents, I've never believed a word of religious claptrap. However, I learned early on that, assuming one can't avoid the subject all together, it's far more pleasant, and generally more polite, to not contradict the Beliefs of Believers in person. Such constraints are absent on the internet.
If we met at a party, and I was really pressed, I would say, "I'm an agnostic with great respect for the Faith of the Faithful". On the net I'm a strong atheist and you're an idiot fundy.
See how that works?
You can buy stuff to turn you into an atheist? Damn, that would have been a lot easier than that thinking crap I went through.
Maybe there are more atheists on the internet because they don't really feel safe saying their an atheist in person around you.
My only response to this one is a set of quotes from invader Zim (may have something to do with the feeling I get that fundies belong more in that world than ours):
Zim: "GIR! The mission's been compromised! Self destruct!"
GIR: "FINALLY!" *boom*
Septic Sceptic, I'm on to you. There's no point in denial, you've been found out. You're a muslim infiltrator, I have proof of your subliminal message:
It's the wacky wild worldview with no stuffy ceremonies! For more information, call 0800-H-E-R-E-S-Y, or visit www.getmeoutofth[b]islam echurch.com!
;) :D
Yeah, come to think of it he's got a point. Once people are no longer relying solely on their local church for information and have access to the largest unregulated flow of information on Earth they start questioning their beliefs. This clearly shows that everyone on Earth who doesn't agree with our church is trying to swindle us by turning us away from our non tax paying, living off of our donation money preachers.
Metaphorically you say? If I wanted to metaphorically kill God, I'd take the batteries out of my clock radio. Fortunately I have no such wish.
"I mean have you ever noticed that there far more atheists on the internet than you see in real life?"
Um. No.
"have you ever doubted your Religion based on comments atheists have said?"
Unlike you, no.
"and if you're wondering what this has to do with this article"
I'm not wondering that at all. It's written by a fundie, why would it have anything to do with (1) the original article, or (2) reality.
"the same methods they use to get you to buy something to turn into an atheist?"
You mean, like a pumpkin and 12 white mice?
what if they could use the same methods they use to get you to buy something to turn into an atheist?
Is it backwards day?
Virtually all brands of christianity have a logo, usually based on a cross. A number have door-to-door salesmen and street vendors (called, among other things, "witnesses"). The catholics had a lucrative business in branded merchandise (relics), and many more churches supply or utilise "holy" water (bottled water uses a similar technique). Churches today commonly sport enormous billboards with pithy slogans, and make heavy use of posters. Many provide cut-down services to hook people while they're still children (alco-pops, anyone?)
There is no atheist logo. Atheists don't put up advertisements on billboards. We don't hawk photons alleged to have come from the big bang itself or encourage people to get closer to evolution by dipping their fingers in fonts of genuine primordial soup after the "cream of tomato" label has been carefully removed. We don't push Atheism-Lite for kids in order to capture them before they've learned to think properly. We don't have people going door-to-door telling everyone to deconvert, and there are also none in public spaces shouting tenets.
What were you saying about commercialism and marketing, again?
When I first started using the internet, I was 14 and back then I did not give a damn about any religion. The only reason I'm here now is because people like you [ie. fundies] piss me off.
@Princess Rot
That was an excellent video game reference. Thanks for the good laugh.
You don't see as many atheists in real life because you only associate with the members of your church.
Also, unlike annoying fundy christians, atheists don't spend time haranguing people in the street.
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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