[Thread title: "Most Beautifull [sic] furniture!"]
Wow - we have an Amazing provider My husband and I went out today to look for new furniture - bedroom, lounge suite etc and we looked in all the usual places and weren't really convinced on anything. So we went away thinking we'd have a think about it....well....on the way home my hubby goes "Hey Hun - do you mind if we backtrack abit here and go down there - I want to see who's that sawmill business is" So away we go and on the way we come across a furniture factory in a big shed with the Most Beautifull furniture at amazing prices!!! So we have all the furniture we needed being delivered next week.
It must have been God who led us down that road.
Amen Amen Amen!!!!
54 comments
I thought the furniture was made by the workers at the sawmill, and that it was your husband who suggested you go there. You know, free will and all that.
But yeah, God controls everything.
Except, as you RR types like to remind us ad nauseum , you're going to get Raptured any day now? So you wasted all that time and money on furniture you're not going to get much use out of.
Or maybe, deep down you're just not sure...
@tracer
Or it's God's way of testing your faith.
Religion is amazing, it provides all kinds of explanation without any sort of facts, evidence and research.
I certainly hope that, as a good Christian family, that you completely ignored all those evil, satanic, atheist, homeless people who, through their lack of faith, do not have money, homes, and furniture provided to them by our kind and loving gawd.
Bargain deals, therefore, Jesus.
If that is sincere...I...I just don't know anymore...
And if you'd waited a few days and found your furniture somewhere else... still god? How about all the people who don't go to the sawmill... god doesn't bother with them?
Maybe god should be less concerned about your furniture and more concerned about those that can't have furniture because they are running for their lives or stuck in refugee camps.
Oh no! It's demon furniture! You were led there by Saaataaaaaannnnn!
Now you've brought the evil into your home. Your only chance to exorcise it is to pile the furniture in your yard and burn it, while dancing around it naked and screaming "Jebus! Jebus!"
Also, douse yourselves in mustard. That be funny ... I mean, pleasing in the sight of God.
Today, i was hungry so my mom suggested we make hashbrowns.
PRAISE THE LORD FOR MY FRIeD POTATO GOODNeSS!!!!111!
Meanwhile, a few miles down the road, there was a car accident and someone died a horrible death, all because god was too busy helping you with your life-altering dilemma of not being able to find furniture. yay GEEEBUS
So God is in the furniture business these days? That might explain something...
In other news: Lucilius, you cracked me up. Again. :)
How cool that your gawd is so concerned with your worldly things like furniture; instead of war, famine, murder, rape, racism...
Amen Amen Amen!!!!
That roughly translates to "let it be true, let it be true, let it be true!", which is the sort of thing you'd normally expect to hear from someone rocking back and forth in the corner of a padded cell.
Sometimes, I honestly wonder how people can believe that God has given them some tiny little convenient coincidence in their personal life, but does nothing to, say, help the starving kids in Africa?
Sounds a lot like that church group who believes that god wants them to be rich.
Honestly, god would rather YOU had that leather armoire than a couple homeless people have dinner. No, seriously, you deserve it. You've pushed month after month for everyone around you to unquestionably believe your personal faith, been absolutely resolute in your dealings with anyone outside your religion, and unashamadly hated those who differ with your beliefs. You've done everything your god asks, so he (she/it/whateverthe-f-itis) wants, nay, desires you to get that lounge chair you were really looking forward to.
Stupid m*!@%&^%#@$!...ignorance is bliss, seriously
But is the furniture born again? Will it be taken in The Rapture? Or will it be Left Behind?!! You better start a new thread - "Pray for your furniture to come to know Jesus!" or "Will our furniture be taken with us in The Rapture, or did Jesus build us all new stuff for our heavenly mansions??" I'm sure your peers would find it to be very thought-provoking, and will fantasize for hours about what kind of bedroom suite they want in heaven. Give us some new material!
Congratulations! You beat the Adversary at his own game, trying to keep you from your righteous lounge suite by steering you into those other (evil) stores, and temporarily blinding DH from the saw mill signs, praise jeebus!
@Laura,
Meanwhile, in Africa...
Oh, wait , they're still dying.
Maybe they should stop praying about trivial things like and food, water, medical supplies and not living in constant fear from militant sociopaths, and start praying about getting a new fucking lounge chair. I heard god likes answering those prayers more than ones that matter.
Fuck off.
Maybe when God is done buying you furniture he can get around to helping some of those starving children in Africa, or to some of those kids who are dying of cancer whose parents have been praying day and night for help.
This is one of the most galling characteristics of fundies--the belief that anyone who isn't the same flavor of fundie as themselves is insignificant in the eyes of their god, and that their god will naturally ignore all the unbelievers in order to focus on the support and comfort and interior decorating of his special followers.
As hand made-real wood furniture isn't ever cheap, I suspect these people have good cash flow, hardly amazing.
It isn't like that little endtable isn't worth $240, it's just most of us (amazingly) can't drop a couple thousand on furniture at one time.
It's nice to know how much more important God thinks you are then people with real needs
Why won't Jesus give up his obsesssion with minutiae of you raptards lives, and do something to help the folk that really need it?
Is Jesus a sick fuck like his dad?
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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