Uh oh...wife found rapture letter
Yeah, she pretty much flipped out when she found the file I have hidden on our computer. I have a notebook hidden in my dresser. Kind of a letter of warning and reminder of how much Jesus loves her and that I really want to see her again. It also tells how to find the hidden file on our computer.
I used one of the basic rapture letters from this site and she pretty much freaked out and threatened to leave. Well hopefully the seed is planted. Back to washing dishes, doing laundry, taking out the trash, and cleaning the litter box for Jesus!
I'm reminded more and more everyday how near our Lord is.
78 comments
"cleaning the litter box for Jesus! "
Normally I'd put in a snappy comment here, but Mishka beat me to it ...
Wow, that is disturbing on a lot of levels. She SHOULD leave you, crazy AND sexist! You fail, die in a fire.
"Well hopefully the seed is planted. Back to washing dishes, doing laundry, taking out the trash, and cleaning the litter box for Jesus!"
I HOPE he meant himself doing that... else, die in a fire.
Reminds me to write my emergency letter, though, detailing how to contact me in case I suddenly vanish to join secret antiterrororganisation stationed on a submarine carrier to pilote mecha; am transported into another world to serve as leader of the spiritarmy of a kingdom or Haruhi decides to remake the world and takes me with her.
All those are just as likely to happen as that rapture thingy, but on the plus side, they actually sound interesting XD.
I know you may love your cat and all, but... really... naming it Jesus? Puh-lease - does little fundie wanna get in the "popular" fundie crowd?
In other news... please say this is a Poe? XD
OK, so let me get this straight: He's written an 'if you read this I'm dead' letter for her to find when he raptures out of this world, and she finds it prematurely. Am I right so far?
Oh, and why did he detour by directing her to a file on the computer? Can't 'if you read this I'm dead' letters ever be straigtforward?
I'm reminded more and more everyday how near our Lord is
Well, no, the message here should have been "maybe I and the rest of my Rapture Ready friends are a few ribs short of a rack".
The litter box thing reminds me of a joke.
A burglar breaks into a house and hears a voice say "Jesus is watching, Jesus is watching!"
Shining his flashlight around the room, he notices a parrot in a cage. The parrot looks at him and says, "Jesus is watching, Jesus is watching!"
"What's your name, pretty bird?" the burglar asks.
"Moses."
"What kind of people would name a parrot Moses?"
"The same kind that would name a pit bull Jesus."
So, in translation:
Mishka planted a note that was pretty much, "Haha, I got raptured and you didn't!" for his wife to find in hopes it would scare her into becoming a proper subservient Christian wife?
Who'd WANT to get raptured along with this guy?
...taking out the trash, and cleaning the litter box for Jesus!
I always wondered what those Christ-crackers were made of.
Mishka, you are batshit crazy. Of course, this should come as no surprise, considering you believe in the rapture.
Constantly witnessing someone who has clearly stated that they are not interested is HARASSMENT.
You are annoying/harassing your wife into leaving you, fuckwit. And good riddence. She deserves better than an irrational, harassing, emotionally manipulative fundie jackass like you. And leaving threating notes around about for her to find is EMOTIONAL MANIPULATION!
Why are you trying to hide something you consider so important from your wife? Do you not want her to be whisked away in your alien spaceship with you when the time comes? Are you of the belief that religion isn't meant for women? Well then, that's a relief! When you get kidnapped by your alien sky fairy, your wife will be set free! Hooray! It'd save her the money from having to see a therapist and bitch about how her nutcase spouse is weirding her out and writing letters to himself. ANY sane woman would want out, too. I know I would.... after calling the local funny farm on his ass.
Hm, I should probably leave a note for someone to find after the End takes me. Of course, They would probably be on a different level of existence and not even understand or care for the concept of what we mere men call "notes". And it's kind've dependant on the Great Old Ones not just eating my whole house. Not like I'm complaining - it's only fair to feed my guests.
Ia! Ia! Cthulhu fhtagn!
hopefully its the seeds of divorce.
She deserves much better. Like a REAL partner in life, as opposed to a self-claimed 'husband'...
I'd love to see the letter, just for giggles. That said, she's suspected her man is nuts, now she's sure. I hope she leaves. "Planted a seed" indeed...
Observation: people think you're crazy.
Possible conclusions, in the absence of other evidence: a) you might be crazy, or b) they're all wrong, you'll show them one day, you're the only one who really understands.....<facial tic>
Check this out, on the same thread:-
"Samson48 - Post A bit confused
If my religious beliefs were that, er, strong, I'd feel compelled to, you know, marry someone who already shared them rather than nagnagnagnagNAGnagnag for Jeebus. Mishka's obviously doing this for the charge he gets out of feeling holier than his wife.
I left a note for my parents on my computer too, but not in case I get raptured, in case I get abducted by an alien or taken away to Cardiff or something.
Granted, I think it would be erased long before I found out Cardiff were on to me. Shoot...
I love you my darling, and I wish I could be with you to protect you. I will be looking for you at the Glorious Return of Jesus Christ to this earth. I prey I will find you.
"I PREY I will find you." Says it all really.
I have no patience with these idiots. The sooner they die out the better.
I really hope she does leave as I'm CERTAIN your wife can do so much better than the likes of you.
Also, isn't Mishka a woman's name?
I can only echo what PapaBear said:
you ARE nuts and she SHOULD leave you.
how the hell did someone so normal end up with this crazy person?
"It also tells how to find the hidden file on our computer."
Who IS this guy - Homer Simpson? Guy gets beaten up and robbed, loses his cards, I.D., and $23. Says to the mugger; "I'm glad you didn't find the $1,000 I had hidden in my shoe."
baDUMP*Pshhh
" cleaning the litter box for Jesus!
Lol! - *Sniifffff* I love the smell of Jesus in the morning
What's he going to do with that letter the day the Rapture claims her and not him? It could happen.
But you know, he seems like an alright guy. He does all the household chores and his first thought is how much he misses her and wants her to get into heaven. He's just crazily focused on its imminence.
Poor couple.
I'm less concerned about the rapture letter, and more concerned about the obvious lack of communication between these two before they were married, if he didn't convert to fundamentalism after they were espoused.
If he did convert later, the nothing that I'm about to say applies, but if he didn't, then why would he marry someone who he differed from so much that he's reasonably sure that she'll be left behind if there's ever a rapture? Why did she marry him if he believed that she was going to go through a nightmarish tribulation because she was an ungodly sinner? These are basic communication problems that really need to be dealt with *before* you go that far in a relationship rather than when someone finds your rapture letter in a hidden file.
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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