Maybe I'm just ignorant on the subject (a real possibility) but I fail to see how your spouse having sex with you when you don't give consent is necessarily a problem. That's not to say I don't believe marital rape exists, but if you've had sex with someone a thousand times before, have a normal sex life with them, etc., I don't see how "surprise sex" needs to be rape, in the sense that at worst it would be an annoyance for the person being woken up by a horny spouse, not a traumatic experience.
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