[Wait until you read the final paragraph... these sick fuckers look forward to unsaved children being so frightened by being "left behind" that they contemplate suicide. What the FUCK?!]
Weeping Mothers Cry 'Where Is My Baby?'
Every news service in the world has now reported millions of missing babies. Thousands of hospitals all over the earth report that every single baby in the maternity ward is missing. At the very moment the world experienced the return of Christ - a strange silence settled on thousands of homes and hospitals. Mothers who one moment were feeding hungry little children were suddenly left clutching at air. Not only are the babies missing but also millions of children under seven years of age.
One observer has been quoted as saying - "Jesus once said - Suffer the little children to come unto me, for of such is the kingdom of God. Now it is very evident that Jesus has called all the little children to himself once and for all."
If you have a missing child - or say missing person in your family - Do not call the police. There is nothing they can do.
The worst aftermath of the great mysterious disappearance last nigh is the horrible wave of suicide attempts being made by thousands. In most cases those who are attempting to end it all have at one time or another had a chance to get right with God. They are those who have heard the message of His coming over and over again and have grown hard to its truth. Thousands of young people woke up this morning to find parents missing. Mothers were gone - brothers and sisters were missing. While many others were surprised by the 'rapture' - they seemed to know instantly what had happened. When the full impact of the coming of Jesus dawned on them and when they realized they had thrown aside so many chances to repent and get ready - they became desperate. Remorse began driving them to seek a way out. Many have been driven completely out of their minds as they sit in their bedrooms sobbing - "I'm left behind - I'm left behind - There is no hope."
65 comments
This is just sick. lighthouse, you were supposed to stay off crack and LSD, and stay on your prescribed meds. Not the other way around!
Wouldn't it be more like: Ahhhhhh (collective sigh of relief). The nutjobs are finally gone. No more homophobia, sexism and, most of all, no more fucking intelligent design. Hurray!
Oh my, more delusional fantasies from the RR crowd?
Grief?(fap,fap,fap), Misery?(fap,fap,fap), Heartbreak?(fap,fap,fap), Despondancy?(fap,fap,fap), Suicide! (fap,fap,fap,fap,fap,fap,Oh,oh,oh Jesus!)
Ok, can we take that as your final answer? Children under seven go straight to heaven? Are you absolutely sure?
I guess you know what you have to do, then? Kill every single kid up to that age, lest they fall into Satan's hands. Anything else would be un-Christian.
I often day dream about having the following:
Safe and fun vacations to exotic locations.
A much larger circle of friends who live near by and enjoy doing interesting things.
A full-time job with benefits that has a good salary with room for growth, in a field I enjoy, with co-workers I can relate and work well with, and allows me to be myself on my off time.
A fun relationship with a cute girl that is positive and has potential for something serious.
A Playstation3 and HD Tv with nice speakers.
Health and joy for myself and my loved ones.
A cheap and dependable hook-up for bomb headies ;)
RaptureRetards day dream about being whisked away to Heaven where they will live in cloud mansions with perfect angel-bodies. There, they will fellate God forever and watch the rest of us suffer.
Doesn't America have homes for the bewildered that such people can be lodged in, under suitable supervision. Thi sis mass hysteria of a dangerous kind. It is not religion, and it needs to be suppressed for the good of the country.
what's best is there's no biblical support for the "age of accountability"
Funny when fundies can't get their shit straight
Many have been driven completely out of their minds as they sit in their bedrooms sobbing - "I'm left behind - I'm left behind - There is no hope."
More likely, this will be you in forty or fifty years when you're on your deathbed, dying of old age after wasting your entire life waiting fruitlessly for the Rapture.
these sick fuckers look forward to unsaved children being so frightened by being "left behind" that they contemplate suicide
I got that far before I wanted to tip CPS off.
The fact that these people are writing fan fic about people COMMITTING SUICIDE shows how repulsive, twisted, and deluded they are. You disgust me beyond these few sentiments.
No, lighthouse, FUD means you're supposed to instill "fear, uncertainty and doubt" into other people, not put your own on display for everyone to see.
Still more realistic than Left Behind .
In LB , it seems that nobody really cares about children disappearing beyond some vague curiosity (and certainly nobody cares enough to take a few days off of work). Of course, that's because the whole LB schtick depends on the idea that everyone who's not a fundie is a horrible monster with no feelings towards anyone else. (Ironic, given that the Rapture fundies look forward to spending eternity celebrating the torture of most of the human population.)
jebus stole the babies?
PEDOPHILE !
+ In this hypothetical situation, somebody would have had to write this news piece. They would have believed in the rapture, and so would have gone to heaven, and so would not have been able to write this. That makes no sense.
LOLWUT: How will people instantly know what happened?
I'm pretty sure God posts a giant sign in the sky that says, "LOL U LOOSORS. LERN2RAPTUR, NOOB"
@ ????/905379: That was my thought, too! These people genuinely do not get how people outside their bubble think!
Then again, the fact that they even write stuff like this at all shows that.
You do realize that the first place this under 8 bullshit came from is the Mormons, right?
Before that unbaptized babies ended up in purgatory.
Seriously, if all christians just got raptured, the world would be much, much, much much much better off
This would be the plot of Left Behind if LB was written by people with actual talent. Sadly, no.
There's a mass disappearance. Many hundreds of millions of people disappear in American and elsewhere, yet somehow, it manages to make no difference to anyone's actual lives. There is no hue and cry; the lights are on, and services apparently continue without interruption. The biggest change is a crime wave that is never seen. The authors seemingly have no concern for worldbuilding and the two main characters, Cameron Williams and Rayford Steele, are nothing but their stand-ins, there to watch, witness and play cheerleader as Darby-esque biblical prophecy unfolds around them without their involvement. The central characters have little or no apparent concern for anyone outside of their small circle save themselves and their own situations. The only vaguely sympathetic or interesting characters are some few of the villains and a few of the minor characters who are basically there to provide strawmen for the main characters to knock down. The Big Bad of the series is a clownshoe who's idea of sound military strategy seems to be doing everything that Rapturite biblical prophecy demands step by step, then trying to kill Jesus when He appears at the appointed place and time, and that actually appears to be one of his smarter ideas.
It doesn't deserve your pity or your fanfiction.
Seven? Why’d you get the age of seven?
Really goes off the rails, though, when pretending that the news progam will connect the suicide attempts to people who’ve rejected Christ several times. Might be true, God would have that information, but no one in the newsroom will have direct knowledge of just how many of the suicide attempts were connected to THAT cause. Stops being an illustrative story and just goes to a sermon.
For me, though, the crux is that it’s GOD who picks the raptured. Not the Christains. I doubt that anyone who’s certain THEY are going to be called up is humble enough to be part of the Rapture. Gonna be about twenty people taken up. And that’s including the saints in their graves. Any reporting will be Archangel Michael. “Hi. Listen, the Rapture was yesterday. You might have heard the trumpets? But if you’re still here, you did not qualify. And before you go blaming the liberals, or the Jews, or the Transgendered queer unwed immigrant mothers, or whoever, you should know it was YOUR fault. Your failing.
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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