This is an extremely important area in determining who is the power structure in the house.
I have never allowed her to sit across from me. It indicates cross purposes or antagonism to you. I have always made her sit to my left, the traditional, submissive, place for the woman.
The right is reserved for the oldest son present, and then the other sons. The left is reserved for daughters. Obviously depending on the number around the table there may be some flowing from left to right, but it is understood that the sons are to the right, the wife and daughters to the left.
And I say grace. If I'm not there my oldest son says it.
Even in devotions I lead them, and if not there the oldest son leads. At the end of our devotions/rosary, all the children present kneel, and, on their knees, are blessed with the sign of the cross on their forehead.
48 comments
@ Frank
I'm an American woman, and believe me, while I do know a few doormats, if he tried that with most women I knew, he'd be "blessed" with that cross in a place that's nowhere near the forehead.
@Frank:
Masochists are found in any culture and in any gender.
The kind of domineering egomania seen here is rightly called "Alpha." God and religion are reduced to the role of a sock puppet for the manipulator's ego. Some of them even graduate to the "Jim Jones" phase to gratify their need to be worshiped.
Unfortunately, a few swift kicks to the nuts will generally turn them into seething hate machines, and will not give them perspective as the kicker would intend.
@ breakerslion
"Unfortunately, a few swift kicks to the nuts will generally turn them into seething hate machines"
How about a precision strike to the neck instead, say between the 5th and 7th cervical vertebrae?
Do you put your wife under your eldest son's authority, along his eventual older sisters?
If so then it is an unhealthy domestic power structure.
At the end of our devotions/rosary, all the children present kneel, and, on their knees, are blessed with the sign of the cross on their forehead.
Aren't Catholics cute?
How old is this guy? I thought crap like that went out with the 60's. Just wait until his oldest son gets an apartment with his girlfriend, like everybody else these days, and "lives in sin". Daddy won't get off his knees for weeks on end.
"Then I taketh mine Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch in hand and counteth to three. Three and no more. Definitely not to four and five is just right out. That's usually about the time mine wife sighs, gets up from the table and takes the children to TGI Fridays, the heathen whore."
@Checkmate:
Must be fun for your wife to have lower status than her oldest son...
Is this a real family, btw, or do they only exist in your imagination?
As a Catholic, not a very orthodox one, but a Catholic anyway and daughter of very devout parents, I can tell you that this guy is actually enjoying the anonimity of internet to write his bullshit. To be honest, even very devout Catholics don´t pray rosary anymore and his attitude would be highly reprimanded by his local priest, because it was not that extreme EVEN IN THE FIFTIES. I think he´s just using some cliché things to try to make a point.
Domesticity in the house of fantasy. It's funny that something called grace is actually the epitome of a graceless, meat-headed superstition. But I guess when you are a nutty man it's all part and parcel of keeping the mental aberration flowing. Perhaps when he shuts reality out by closing the front door he is at last able to let the feeble minded dunderhead out to play.
And here's the thing: when these darling children grow up, the rest of us will have to pony up to fix the damage this bozo has inflicted. You know, spousal assault, assault on children, welfare, on and on.
@Frank
Clearly, you've never known an American woman, of any living generation. Even my great-grandmother would have told this guy to go to hell, and she was born in the 1890s.
This submissive woman, oldest-son-above-his-mother bullshit has never been "tradition", even where it's still practiced in the Middle East. It's the result of men FORCING women into that position with laws and threats of physical harm, death, starvation, shunning, eternal damnation, etc., depending on the region.
Fuck your wife (if she actually exists) for allowing you to get away with abusing and brainwashing her kids with your sickness.
I was raised Catholic until right after my first communion. We were immersed in it. Church services, CCD, church activities, charity events, family nights, we did it all. There wasn't a single family in our (massive) church community that was like this. I didn't run into any when I made a misguided attempt to return to the church a decade ago, either.
The rosary was never said in a group setting that I am aware of. That is an individual thing among the Catholics who still do the meditations, generally at a time of day when the mind and spirit are less likely to be distracted. Again, I have yet to meet even a cradle Catholic who keeps his/her family in this kind of oppressive power structure.
This reads a lot like religious fap-fiction. It's what he wants his family to be, not how they truly are. No woman has to play second in command to her own son anymore.
Calling shenanigans.
It is difficult to talk to, look at , and play footsies with anyone sitting to your right, or left.
I hope the sons have been taught to take orders ferom their mother.
Given that I don't subscribe to such manipulative forms of control over others would that mean that I'm a Satanist in your eyes?
If I ever have children maybe I should bless them with an upside down cross, or a pentagram, as I'd refuse to follow this rigid social structure.
What a liar. Nothing more than a silly little boy's fantasy.
@ Frank-fuck you, & fuck your entire dismal little gray island.
I have heard people described as alphas before. When the label "alpha" is given by someone to someone else, it's usually a sarcastic, derogatory way of saying they're a pretentious douchebag. When someone gives the "alpha" label to themselves, that tells me they are pretentious douchebags who think way too highly of themselves. So yeah.
the position to one's left-hand side is in no wise a "submissive" one. it is --- for right-handed people, anyway --- a position of trust; the spot furthest away from your strong hand and any weapon it might hold. to allow somebody to sidle right up to your weak flank, in that spot, was something medieval feudal warriors reserved only for those they trusted implicitly, such as their wives.
"I have never allowed her to sit across from me. It indicates cross purposes or antagonism to you."
Yes, but are you properly protecting your mind from her psychic powers?
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Bad idea. Give her more of a chance to bitch you out if you act like a misogynistic idiot (Too late ;))
I bet you if he passes, he'll make sure his "Oldest son" is "head of the household" and not the wife. What is it with these fundies thinking less of women? Why is it that intelligence in a woman is something that intimidates these nutjobs? You two are probably going to spend your whole lives together, and the whole "Submissive dumb bimbo" act probably gets old after a while.
What's interesting here is how he writes, "It indicates cross purposes or antagonism to you..."
It's interesting he's prepared to tell other "alphas" how to think, telling them not merely what *he* thinks indicates cross-purposes, but what they should think indicates cross-purposes as well (by using the pronoun "you" instead of "me").
And does that mean the cashier or the bank teller, standing directly across from the customer, is demonstrating animosity?
What a stupid idea.
What a stupid man.
Right, I'll bet you're not even married.
Most Catholics will think you're cuckoo.
The eldest son shouldn't be an authority, he's a kid. Dad & Mom are the authorities.
Even in other Patriarchal, old-fashioned households, Mom's still an authority (even if considered 'Second In Command').
No child should have authority over the parent!
Woman is equal to Man and the eldest son is subject to both mother & father!
And you're really just a dumb, single guy living with Mommy & Daddy.
Alpha Game Plan site is basically a site where Male Supremacists can share their M.S. tall-tales with each other.
You have the guy yammerin' about his "bride" and blabbin' about how calling your wife your "best friend" is somehow evil.
Then there's this guy....
Sounds like a forum for Omega-male M.S. fantasies & tall-tales.
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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