Bible Man #fundie boards.straightdope.com

[On the collection of all factual material that exists]

Yes, all facts come from a special collection of 66 books written by 40 different authors who wrote over a period of 1500 years.

[on ignoring pesky facts that get in the way of his view of the Bible]

no one except Bible believers knows when the sun was actually formed

[bearing false witness in regard to current evolutionary theory with bonus smarmy attitude]

Microevolution: the beaks of succeeding generations of finches will adapt to their environmental conditions.
Macroevolution: Frogs will eventually sprout wings and fly away, monkeys will all turn into men, and given enough time and chance that chair you're sitting in will eventually get up and walk out of the room.
The first type has happened on a daily basis since creation. The second type has never happened and never will. Further, if all species had been formed this way as the theory postulates, there would be massive evidence for it literally at our feet - there is none. It's a hopelessly bankrupt theory while ironically, anyone who believes it might actually be the only slim chance to validate it - obviously having somewhat less evolved reasoning powers.

[On where he gets his belief that his interpretation is, well, Gospel]

Jesus again told me that all your bizarre personal beliefs about the Bible are also false and come from listening to the doctrines of demons. The spirit you are listening to is not the Holy Spirit but a lying spirit, and to claim otherwise is blasphemy on your part.

24 comments

Confused?

So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!

To post a comment, you'll need to Sign in or Register. Making an account also allows you to claim credit for submitting quotes, and to vote on quotes and comments. You don't even need to give us your email address.