[on a thread talking about heaven]
If I dont have a dog in this world...I gonna get one in heaven (I hope). Heaven is COOL!
43 comments
Actually, from following the Rapturds for a while, this one is actually young - might not even be old enough to drink. But she's from Canada, so I will hold her to a higher standard.
If you want a pet, make yourself fucking useful and adopt one of the many abandoned ones you'll find at your local shelter. Y'know, do something helpful while you're alive than hoping that jeebus will do it all for you.
I wanna pony! And Legos! And Barbies! Maybe a Ken.
(Of course, it's actually LEGO, no plural. Just FYI.)
(Also, LEGO in heaven would be really cool, retro stuff, none of these over-specialized pieces they have now.)
(In hell, they just get Rasti , and it melts from the heat before you can build anything!)
Poor girl. You gotta admit, for anyone who de-converted from Christianity, heaven seemed like a pretty bitchin' place. I remember our pastor getting all starry-eyed talking about how there would be 24hr all-you-can-eat country buffets, streets paved with gold, chocolate fondue fountains that never ran out of chocolate, we'd all have huge mansions. I mean, seriously, if you believe in this shit it does seem like a kick-ass place.
It sounds pretty cool to me, except for all that "you won't be with your family" and "we'll spend all day sitting at God's feet and praising him for all eternity" bullshit. But give me a body that will never get fat, fall prey to diabetes or heart failure and I'd be dipping angel food cake in the chocolate fondue fountain 24/7/365. Fuck yeah. And you could give it to your heavenly pooch, as well. Because I guess a dog with a glorified body wouldn't be allergic to chocolate.
Oooh, guess you didn't hear then. According to the pope, dogs don't have souls, so you won't find them in heaven.
I guess you'd better do all the things you want to do in life, as opposed to waiting until you die to truly live.
If they let dogs in Heaven, I'll just add that to the reasons why I would never want to be there.
(I have a disturbing, almost fanatical hatred of dogs. Just....can't stand them.)
You're forgetting something: according to your own doctrines, animals don't have souls .
I hate to say this, but even though it is a cool animated film, All Dogs Go To Heaven" is not a documentary. [/Don Bluth*]
Thus, as Enzo would say:
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*- And even if you think "ADGTH" is a documentary little Raptard, it's director Don Bluth is a heretic LDSer.
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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