[Another fundie has asked the others what the Millinial Kingdom of Christ will be like, and what they will do in it.]
I've had thoughts that I might have a job as some kind of "safety officer". Say an unsaved person tries to wrong a saint... one of us safety officers appears and takes care of the matter before the intended victim is victimized... or a child skins his or her knee and one of us appears to console the child and apply a band-aid.
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If you could foresee a person wronging another, and stop them before they carry out their misdeed, a la Minority Report, why couldn't you turn up to catch the child and stop them hurting themselves? Unless you like watching kids in pain, I don't see why you wouldn't. You heartless monster.
or a child skins his or her knee and one of us appears to console the child and apply a band-aid.
You will be one of Christ's safety officers and you won't even be able to prevent skinned knees? Sounds like he'll need to come up with a better training program.
"an unsaved person tries to wrong a saint."
I imagine a "millinial" kingdom would have lots of millinery.
(Can't sign in, on my cellphone at the airport)
Why would a perfect world need 'safety officers'? Your fanfiction is flawed, Timbers.
Kid, I'd LIKE to stop you from skinning your knee in the first place, but since our stance is firmly against socialist healthcare, the big man decided it would be better to charge you for band-aids instead.
@nazan
There's saints in Anglican and orthodox traditions. But to my memory, they are post-milliinal like Catholics.
Bonus though, saint just means someone who has gone to heaven. Those who are sainted by the catholic church are basically those guys who they are 100% sure are there.
I thought they'd spend their time patting themselves on the back for believing in the Rapture, not letting anyone vaccinate their children or baptize them before the age of responsibility and voting for Tea Party candidates, and snickering at all the liberals, homos, Yankees*, non-Christians**, pansy-assed wine-tasters, opera fans, illegal aliens, guys who don’t like sports, women who wear pants, people who read the NIV Bible instead of the KJV and people who thought their grandmother was a monkey, who are now weeping and gnashing their teeth in agony in the Lake O'Fire®.
* Northerners, not the baseball team
"And how would this "taking care of the matter" occur? The traditional Christian method of violence and abuse?"
In the Left Behind books, the unsaved were killed by a lightning bolt from heaven, and their souls condemned to hell.
They also were allowed to live until they were 100, and if they weren't saved by that point, they died and again were condemned to hell.
Of course, in the name of Christian justice, the "safety officers" wouldn't prevent wrongs against unsaved persons.
What would a wrong against a saint entail? If I made an anti-Christian remark would a "safety officer" appear? Would they be wearing brown shirts?
a child skins his or her knee and one of us appears to console the child and apply a band-aid.
As opposed to here in the US, where the RR crowd would happily leave the kid to bleed if the parents couldn't afford $12,000 a year for medical insurance.
Besides, "And Jesus answering said unto them, The children of this world marry, and are given in marriage: But they which shall be accounted worthy to obtain that world [the afterlife], and the resurrection from the dead, neither marry, nor are given in marriage" [Luke 20:34-35]
So where will the children come from? Free love? Or do the people resurrected as little kids stay little kids for all eternity? I don't think Timbers has worked this out completely.
@nazani14, @mattiedef
Actually, all Christians believe in saints -- it's not something that's exclusive to Catholics/Orthodox/Anglicans. A saint is simply someone who "belongs to God", so to speak.
To evangelicals and fundies such as the OP, a saint is someone who is "saved." You don't hear them use the term much because they believe it's idolatrous to pray to, make images of, or otherwise glorify saints in any manner.
I suppose that's a big part of the problem, actually. They think they're all saints.
"I'll pummel a guy into a pile of protoplasm (or worse) then give a kid a Band-Aid". This OP is really dumb.
Isn't the "Millennial Reign of Christ" supposed to be a world of love & peace where people are perfect & work is unnecessary?
"Safety Officers"? Are you really that insecure about your maleness?
So ... to you protestant Fundies, "saint" means any saved person, alive or dead.
As distinct from the Catholic definition of "saint," which HAS to be dead.
Since you believe you're all saints, and since you believe we are in or near the End Times and our days are numbered, would that make you ... Latter-Day Saints?
Tall Timbers, also known as the band aid angel.
Side note to Tall Timbers....I sure hope you are not over 10 years old. It would be embarrassing to think you are old enough to be considered an adult.
Why would your so-called Tribulation Saints need anyone to guard their virtue, as it were?
@TimeToTurn: if you can manage to force yourself to read Tim Lahaye and Jerry Jenkin's "masterpiece" Kingdom Come, you'll get an idea what Tall Timbers here and the other Rapture Readyites regularly wax ecstatic over. A lot of them basically seem to regard Lahaye's take on the Millennial Kingdom as THE definitive picture of what would look like; horse-melting Jesus transforms the world into something as nightmarishly creepy than the DPRK.
Actually... this job would not be that bad. Not very fundie as this person is planning to do something nice for the millennial community at large no matter how derpy the actual belief in a millennial community may be.
@1636064
I suppose such a person could prevent a kid getting hurt, too.
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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