++"Life couldn't have just happened."
That's your opinion, Davey; not evidence. Learn the difference.
++"Due to perplexing unanswerable questions that anguish the unbelieving mind (like where did the universe come from?),"
Why the hell would that anguish our minds? Not all of us have so inflated an opinion of ourselves as to be tormented by the idea that we might not know everything there is to know about the universe. That's an almost exclusively theist issue, actually.
++"atheist scientists have been forced to concede that the universe came from nothing. Although they attempt to logically explain their foolish position, at best they utter complete bogus nonsense."
Translation: I couldn't follow the theory because it was more complex than god saying "make it so" so it must have been nonsense.
++"Evolution is not legitimate science"
That's not even an opinion, Davey. That's just plain stupid.
++"it is a false religion "
Another word to add to the tower list of those which you do not understand.
++"that unbelievers and skeptics CHOOSE to believe. "
In the same way we CHOOSE to believe that fire is hot after we make the mistake of touching it or seeing other people burned by it.
++"Christians likewise choose, but we choose to believe the Bible; however, in drastic contrast, Christians have an abundance of historical and archaeological proofs to support their faith in the Holy Bible"
The bible is not historical proof of the its own accuracy, nor is the inability to understand archeological findings within the context of their surroundings archaeological proof. What you have is the desire to have historical and archaeological proof of your faith spurring you to purposefully misunderstand everything you see to the most laughably pathetic degree. Nothing more.
++"Evolutionists have nothing to support their retarded claims other than more retarded claims."
Well, that and innumerable experiments with short-lived organisms like flies and bacteria. And a massive chunk of the medical industry that successfully operates exclusively on its understanding and application of the theory of evolution's principles. And every breeding program in human history.
++"I'll stick with the time-tested, historically-accurate, archaeologically-supported, Word of God!!!"
Good luck with that. Be sure to tell us if you ever find it.