(Answering the question: Who would you like to talk to in heaven?)
Mary - Jesus' Mom. As a Jewish mother, I'm sure we'll hear all about the cute things He did and said as a baby and child. (Jesus: "Awwww, Mom....not that story!")
47 comments
Since this isn't fundie, I'm going to join in.
I would want to talk to Joseph.
You know where I'm going with this.
Jesus?
I don't think so..
Jesus is a Greek word.
This isn't fundie, it's just cute and silly. Frankly, I wouldn't mind talking to her either, if there is an afterlife and we get to meet in it.
I'd also like to talk to Joan of Arc, Julius Caesar, Edgar Allan Poe, and pretty much every one of my favorite authors I have no chance of ever meeting in this life.
Considering how many millions of people are likely to be in Heaven, do you really think Mary or Jesus are going spend all their time talking to you personally? The more likely situation is that they'll be more like celebraties, people you read about on the HeavenNet, but never actually get to meet, but perhaps you could see them zoom by at high speed in a stupid looking bullet proof glass car.
Maybe this doesn't belong here, and maybe it's just because it's from Rapture Ready, but I actually find this kind of creepy. Also, does anyone else think that Jesus would zap Mary with lightning for talking about all the stuff he did? He's supposed to be sinless, afterall....
I don't know which is worse.
....Oo
...Okay...Not creepy!
oo
Since Jesus is supposed to live like a normal human, do you suppose, like, well, (shuffle feet), he had erections, and nocturnal emissions, 'n' all that?
...or that time He made those little birds out of clay, then brought them to life, and that rabbi who lived down the street scolded Him, telling Him that only YWH could create life, and so He turned the poor man into a pillar of salt. Oh, he was such a cheeky little boy!
The baby Jesus was not like that. The baby Jesus murdered those who disobeyed. The baby Jesus will torture you and kill you if you disobey. The baby Jesus will torture and kill you if you mock the baby Jesus. The baby Jesus will annihilate all in the baby Jesus' path and the baby Jesus will have dominion over all.
No one can stop the baby Jesus.
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
To post a comment, you'll need to Sign in or Register . Making an account also allows you to claim credit for submitting quotes, and to vote on quotes and comments. You don't even need to give us your email address.
