Personally, I believe many of the trolls who come here are not atheists, as they claim, but really are sad little child-like people who know they are in rebellion to God and are miserable because of it. I believe you come to this site because there is something deep inside you that yearns to know the truth, yet you squelch that yearning and turn back to the world. Truly, I have pity for you. If the internet had been what it is today when I was a teen, I shudder to think what the devil would have done with me. I cringe at the thought of what I would have become