Let me tell you a story...well. two actually.
I was in my bedroom one night and I was getting really wound up about something or other. I remember praying about it and hearing a CLEAR voice telling me to read Ecclesiastes 3:1. I did so and found that the passage was telling me exactly what to do in my situation- that there is a time to do everything and that I should not worry.
The second story is when I was away with the worship band and I was in the dorm room praying. All of a sudden I saw the form of a dove. This dove began to talk to me in Hebrew (I understand a little Hebrew) telling me to come to Him and that I should not be afraid to do so.
This dove was so real I could see every little detail of it- the wings, the feathers, the beak.
Explain that!
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Yeah? There’s a crow outside my window talking to me in English. Foul mouthed little bastard too, "Fark, Fark, Fark..."
Big deal, dogs talk all the time.
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Oh and you might want to get that hearing voices thing checked out. There's medications that will stop that now.
Bernard.
That really is a big load of crap you have written. And you know you made it up to impress your fundie friends. You are telling big whoppers for Jesus. Explain that!
Or, naughty, naughty, have you been smoking something illegal?
"This dove was so real I could see every little detail of it- the wings, the feathers, the beak."
The fact that your hallucinations are so vivid is not good for your prognosis. Seek medical attention immediately.
When I was 10, God appeared to me as a small hurricane made of diamonds coming out of my ceiling. No, I wasn't on acid, and no, that doesn't prove God exists.
Explain that!
Okay.
YOU'RE INSANE.
1) You've probably already read Ecclesiastes, and your subconscious was kicking in. Once, I was overwhelmed by a situation, and a word I had heard only once before leaped into my mind. I didn't know what the word meant, so when I could, I looked it up, it fit the situation perfectly. Of course, I had already known and forgotten what the word meant--it was just my subconscious.
2) I have no idea. What on earth is a "worship band"--do you mean a Christian rock band? And come on, if a vision from God had really told you to come to him, you would've gone and you wouldn't be here telling us about it, right? Unless you've been to Heaven and back, in which case, you have no reason to worry about us silly atheists, because you've already personally seen God.
"I was in my bedroom one night and I was getting really wound up about something or other"
Yeah I'll just bet you were.
"This dove was so real I could see every little detail of it- the wings, the feathers, the beak."
Should have taken a video!
ITS THE DOVE FROM ABOVE!!!!
cue reeves and mortimer, shooting stars stylee quiz show
@capt obvious pmsl, fucking brilliant. 10/10
hehhehehe
"There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven."
-Ecclesiastes 3:1
"Holy generic advice Batman!"
"I've seen better in fortune cookies, Robin."
"I could see every little detail of it- the wings, the feathers, the beak."
I don't think the basic shape of a bird counts as every detail.
The second story is when I was away with the worship band
This one time... in band camp...
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Her story was better than yours.
if god is talking to you, then you would be a prophet.
Jesus warned about false prophets. Get away from me, SATAN!
"Explain that! "
You're delusional?
Ya know, when I was going to college in the 80s I tried LSD and I never saw anything much more than tree branches getting melty, while my friends were seeing faces, hearing voices, etc. I don't know if that means something is wrong with me...
"Explain that!"
Delusional Schizophrenia
You really don't need LSD, etc. to hallucinate like that. I do it all the time with my un-aided mind. Though, I *know* I'm seeing things not there. I just have a very good imagination. Bernard here has a tenuous grasp on reality.
The second story is when I was away with the worship band and I was in the dorm room praying. All of a sudden I saw the form of a MONKEY. This MONKEY began to talk to me in KLINGON (I understand a little KLINGON) telling me to come to HER and that I should not be afraid to do so.
This MONKEY was so real I could see every little detail of it- the BANANA, the POO, the TAIL.
EXPLAIN THAT.
(fix'd.)
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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