YOU DO NOT NEED TO ASTRAL TRAVEL.
Seriously. Stop fucking assuming you have to. It’s not a fucking requirement. You do NOT need it to talk to your gods. You do NOT need it to talk to spirits. It’s NOT fucking necessary. You aren’t part of a super special fucking club if you do it. You’re just a fucking practitioner who uses astral travel.
I’m seeing a HUGE increase of people wanting to travel but they have no BASIC FUCKING UNDERSTANDING of how to do SUPER FUCKING BASIC THINGS like PROTECT THEMSELVES. Let me fucking tell you. If you can’t protect yourself and your home and/or cleanse and/or exorcise it then maybe you shouldn’t be fucking traveling. Because something is MORE THAN LIKELY going to follow you back. Gods might follow you back. Goblins might follow you back.Creatures that create nightmares and PHYSICALLY ATTACK you might follow you back. What the fuck will you do then?
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What religion would this be classified as, if any? Is it Wicca? Generic New Age? Oh, who cares, any quote that isn't yet another one by a Christian fundie is okay in my book.
Hmmmm... Half round of a Caps Lock abusing (shouting) match between people, who believe similarly, in the grand tradition of "No, you are the heathen!". I think I classify this as normal believer behavior. :]
"YOU DO NOT NEED TO ASTRAL TRAVEL."
Sorry, sounded like the beginning of an ad from fantasy world.
LOL ! Further down the post ...
"(Now some are going to say that I’m a fucking hypocrite as I sell flying salves . I have this insane believe that if you’re buying a flying salve than you probably know what you’re doing. And, frankly, if you buy something to help you cross over and you didn’t make sure you’re ready, IDK what to tell you. Why’d you spend money on things you weren’t sure you know how to use? That’s literally buying a drug and then being fucking surprised by the trip you’re having while on it. What did you expect?)"
The Goblin followed me home.
Can we keep it Mom ? Can we ? Pleeeeaaasssee. I'll feed it and keep it's cage clean and everything. Oh Please mum, can we keep it ?
After the Goblin follows anyone back to a house with a 6 year old, it will not ever follow anyone again.
Mommy can we keep it I promise to take care of it and play house with it and dress up and spank it when it is bad and mommy mommy why is it running why is it running mommy bring it back bring it baaaack! Wahhhhh
Translation:
Astral Traveling is an altered state of conciousness, sometimes drug-induced (i.e. this guy\gal's salve) and sometimes meditation-induced, where a person travels to alternate planes of reality. Mostly a New Age religious belief.
I'll Astral Travel & Lucid Dream whenever I want to...so there! *BLAAAH*!
Everyone else will comment about how the very idea of such things is wackadoodle but I'm a good person who won't begrudge them that right to that view!
And really, OP, you're rather excitable....cool down a bit....chill....a few less F-bombs....SHEESH!
This holiday season is making people hilarious.
OP, you have no basic fucking understand of super fucking basic things like reality. But we all knew that.
Hey! I astral travel all the time, in Dungeons & Dragons .
Gotta watch out, though. There are Intellect Devourers* on the Astral Plane, and they have 6+6 hit dice and 200 psionic strength points.
*) Not to be confused with Thought Eaters, which only travel on the ETHEREAL plane, which is TOTALLY DIFFERENT from the Astral plane.
"What the fuck will you do then?"
Maybe stop using the expletive 'fuck' as every second work in your little tirade?
'Fuck' attracts demons. Or didn't you know? every time you say ir write it, another demon is loosed from hell. And they assuredly will want to come and personally thank the person who has enabled that.
Oh man, I almost forgot people believed in this. Fantastic way to remind me of this, Snarker of Hippies, you´ve done a great job finding it. I seriously laughed reading it and we need a lot more quotes like this.
Okay, somebody please tell me that a vast majority of religious don't believe in:
A: Magic of any kind (including Astral projection)
B: Goblins
Holy fuck, this guy claims to be Christian, yet he believes in gods. Did he miss the explanation of monotheism in Sunday school? How the hell did he make it to our century let alone learn to operate a computer. We're talking pre-feudalism level of superstition here.
"Oh the posh posh traveling life, the traveling life for me
"YOU DO NOT NEED TO ASTRAL TRAVEL."
He's right of course, I've never felt the slightest urge to astral travel.
Proof positive that even tourette's syndrome needn't preclude the utterance of sound advice. Though it does mean that vocal tics are transmitted to the fingers and are accompanied by other keyboard tics, such as compulsive caps-locking. Plus, of course, it does mean a plain statement is usually followed by a stream of caps-lock infested gibberish.
Gods might follow you back. Goblins might follow you back.Creatures that create nightmares and PHYSICALLY ATTACK you might follow you back. What the fuck will you do then?
Easy, I conjur up all the spirits from my magic eight ball and my Ouija board and sic them on each other. Oh the fun watching them battle it out. The survivors can be chased away with a little garlic and some salt thrown over the left shoulder (NOT THE RIGHT SHOULDER, unless you want a catastrophe!!!).
Aaaaaagh, he was doing so well! And then that second paragraph shunted this directly into "Oh NOW WHAT??" territory.
For the record, I don't do astral travel myself. Believe it's possible? The jury's still out on that one.
"Creatures that create nightmares and PHYSICALLY ATTACK you might follow you back. What the fuck will you do then? "
Protection from Evil
This spell wards a creature from attacks by evil creatures, from mental control, and from summoned creatures. It creates a magical barrier around the subject at a distance of 1 foot. The barrier moves with the subject and has three major effects.
Third, the spell prevents bodily contact by summoned creatures. This causes the natural weapon attacks of such creatures to fail and the creatures to recoil if such attacks require touching the warded creature.
Arcane Material Component: A little powdered silver with which you trace a 3-foot -diameter circle on the floor (or ground) around the creature to be warded.
First off, you sound real intelligent with all that swearing. Please, continue telling us all the different contexts "fuck" can be used in.
All I have to do - at the railway/coach booking office - is speak normally, whenever I arrange/buy a train/coach ticket, thanks.
The glass partitions have microphones/speakers - a la those in banks - so as the booking clerk and the customer can hear each other properly. No 'Projection' required. [/hyper-smartarse]
...and unless you can arrange teleportation facilities (which won't turn me inside out - as per that poor baboon - or fuse me with an insect at the molecular-genetic level! [/"The Fly"] >_< X3 ), therefore I have 'to do SUPER FUCKING BASIC THINGS' such as travelling ('Fucking Travelling', you say? If only there were brothel facilities on those trains/coaches; one wouldn't be so stressed by travel, eh?! [/hyper-smartarse II] X3 ); and I do protect myself and my home: I lock the door prior to travelling via train/coach, and I always have a couple of... - if you know what I mean - in my wallet! [/Scouts; 'Be Prepared'] [/Something for the Weekend] [/hyper-smartarse III, and you've struck out] >:D
...oh, and as for:
"YOU DO NOT NEED TO ASTRAL TRAVEL" "NOT" "HUGE" "BASIC FUCKING UNDERSTANDING" "SUPER FUCKING BASIC THINGS" "PROTECT THEMSELVES" "MORE THAN LIKELY"
image
X3
...and as for 'YOU DO NOT NEED TO ASTRAL TRAVEL', well, [i]some[/i] do! [/Doug Piranha-levels of sarcasm] X3
If goblins follow me I will consult the Holy Book or Armaments, or the Bros. Grimm.
Selling flying salves 0_0 ?
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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