At the end of 2023, our son came home for the holidays and we immediately noticed something was off. He was extremely withdrawn, anxious, and heavily addicted to gaming.

[...]

As we started to investigate, we discovered he had been using marijuana and secretly taking female hormones. When we confronted him, he first told my wife he was trans. The next day, he came to speak with me, and I told him we needed to talk honestly. I asked him to walk me through when and how he came to that conclusion because nothing in his upbringing or past behavior had ever indicated it.

Instead of opening up, he gave a scripted answer—something we had already seen echoed in online spaces: “Since I was 14.” It didn’t feel genuine. A parent knows. My son couldn’t even look me in the eyes when telling me this.

We later found out he was deeply involved in a niche, online gaming community that was almost entirely made up of LGBTQ and transgender-identifying individuals. He was also addicted to porn and anime, which seemed to fuel a lot of his fantasies and emotional confusion.

I tried to have an open and honest conversation with him about it, but he refused. He said, maybe he shouldn’t live under our roof anymore because he didn’t want to have to explain himself. In that moment, I realized he knew—deep down—that his story wouldn’t hold up to real, honest discussion. He chose to leave.