The Betrayal of Former Incels
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In his appearance on Naama Kates’ podcast, Todd Z. represents the very typical former incel, or fakecel, life story. He used to put himself down a lot, didn’t believe in himself, even called himself a Grotesque Subhuman, and of course identified as an incel. But then certain events and connections in Todd’s life spurred him to try self-improvement, which led to a positive experience with a woman, which in turn improved his confidence, and now Todd finds himself able to date, flirt with women, have sex, etc. His takeaway from this? “If I can do it, other incels can too”

In his appearance, Todd also condemns incels’ online communities for their negativity. He never quite states it directly, but it seems like he believes they should either be censored, deleted or otherwise have their negativity curtailed. Why? Well, because he believes they are harmful to men for whom it’s not over. And therein lies the betrayal.
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When he identified as an incel, someone for whom it’s over, Todd did not have a problem with blackpilled content. He began to have a problem with it only after he suddenly found himself on the other side – the side of normal men, men who just need to put in some effort. Men who ideally shouldn’t be in incel communities at all. Instead of recognizing that he had wrongly assessed his attractiveness and came to the wrong place, Todd instead acts as if it’s the incels that had some sort of duty to inform him of that. That it’s not his own mistake but their deception, their deliberate toxicity. And that’s the betrayal – instead of quietly leaving and enjoying his success, he lashes out at his former comrades and demands that they, in their own communities, prioritize the needs of men like him.

Are there fakecels in incels communities? There are. But there are also actual incels – men who cannot become conventionally attractive and who cannot hope to meet a partner barring a one in a billion miracle of the kind that happened to me. Generally, I believe that incel communities exist for the benefit of the latter. After all, fakecels like Todd are just men who struggle with dating… which is a very normal experience. If he wants communities for such men, plenty are available – redpill, bluepill, no pill, whatever. Someone who wants to discuss the normal struggles of finding a romantic partner has the entire internet at their disposal. A true incel who, unlike Todd, gets absolutely nothing, has only incel spaces to turn to. Why then should he limit himself just to protect more advantaged men from harming themselves? There is no justification for that. The only reason fakecels demand an end to blackpill negativity is that they view their needs as more important than the needs of incels. It’s pure tribalism: “they (the incels) should stop doing what they’re doing because that would be convenient to us (the fakecels)”