The Rev. William H. Grimes #fundie #sexist simplychristian.fandom.com

Sermon 14: False God

By The Rev. William H. Grimes

“Wherefore, my dearly beloved, flee from idolatry.”-1 Corinthians 10:14

“Mortify therefore your members which are upon the earth; fornication, uncleanness, inordinate affection, evil concupiscence, and covetousness, which is idolatry.”-Colossians 3:5

“They that observe lying vanities forsake their own mercy.”-Jonah 2:8

”Turn ye not unto idols, nor make to yourselves molten gods: I am the LORD your God.”-Leviticus 19:4

Last Friday, sinful seductress Taylor Swift unleashed her wicked album “Lover” onto the public. I was at my local Target that day, and the deluxe edition albums in the display up front were being snatched by the second by misguided teenage girls and young women. I also believe I saw a weird hipster looking sodomite guy buy a copy. I’m going to post a more thorough analysis of this abomination unto the Lord on this site, but I wanted to focus on the most blasphemous song on the album, which is called “False God.”

This song denies the divinity of Christ! It promotes sexuality in such a blasphemous and heinous way!!! THIS IS A DISGUSTING DISGRACE!!! SAY AMEN IN THE HOUSE OF THE LIVING GOD!!!!! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!

The chorus says: But we might just get away with it / Religion's in your lips / Even if it's a false god / We'd still worship / We might just get away with it /The altar is my hips / Even if it's a false god /We'd still worship this love

What is this wicked heathen seductress saying? She wants to dupe this randy young man into worshipping at the altar of her body and in particular her succulent hips!!!!!!!!!! SHE THINKS HER HIPS ARE SUPERIOR TO THE LIVING GOD WHO ESTABLISHED ALL, SWIFT THINKS THAT HER WICKED HIPS ARE MORE POWERFUL THAN THE KING OF KINGS AND THE LORD OF LORDS! THIS IS AN ABOMINABLE FARCE! ARE WEAK SAUCE SOUTHERN BAPTIST PARENTS LETTING THEIR YOUNG GIRLS LISTEN TO THIS SMUT?!!!! IT’S ATROCIUS! ARE THEIR PASTORS APPROVING OF THIS?!!!!!!! IT’S HERESY!

YEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!

In the song, she also says: I know heaven's a thing/ I go there when you touch me, honey and also: They say the road gets hard and you get lost / When you’re led by blind faith, blind faith

IF YOU HAVE BLIND FAITH IN THE WICKED HARLOT TAYLOR SWIFT INSTEAD OF DURABLE AND TESTED FAITH IN THE LORD JESUS CHRIST, YOU WILL ENDURE ETERNAL HELLFIRE AND ROASTING FOREVER AND GNASHING THE TEETH AND AN UNQUENCHABLE THIRST FOR EVEN A DROP OF WATER! YOU WILL NOT HAVE IT BECAUSE YOU CHOSE ETERNAL SEPARATION FROM GOD WITH LUCIFER AND SWIFT INSTEAD OF TRUSTING THE LORD JESUS CHRIST AND MAKING HIM YOUR PERSONAL LORD AND SAVIOR! IF YOU HAVEN’T ACCEPTED HIM YET, WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?!!!! DO IT NOW!!!! God’s people said AMEN!

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Confused?

So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!

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