Ball Earth is a Jesuit Hoax #fundie

Freudian Slip Award

Ball Earth is a Jesuit Hoax #fundie quora.com

A Godly America is one who teaches Puritan Christian Dominionust Values, who teaches the strongest fact of science there is, that the Earth is a flat disk topped with a firmament, like Sandy's threesome from SpingeBob. One who teaches men are a beautiful creation of the Lord they God, not a monkey's mutated period blood. One that teaches that Man's purpose in life is to Serve and Fear God all our days. I miss the puritans every day and I cry of nostalgia just thinking of the times! Good old days!

19 comments

I miss the puritans every day and I cry of nostalgia just thinking of the times! Good old days!

If this is serious, Hall Earth is a Jesuix Boat ought to be forced to spend a while living like the puritans did back then. See how good those old days really were.

“A Godly America is one who teaches Puritan Christian Dominionust Values, who teaches the strongest fact of science there is, that the Earth is a flat disk topped with a firmament, like Sandy's threesome from SpingeBob.”

So, ACE biblical literalism?
Graduates of which fucking FAIL in any follow-on education attempts. Yeah, no thanks.

“One who teaches men are a beautiful creation of the Lord they God,”
They god? You mean, THY god, maybe?

“not a monkey's mutated period blood.”
Jesus fuck, learn some biology. Period blood indicates a LACK of offspring. So any mutations in the egg, it’s too late for any selection.

"One that teaches that Man's purpose in life is to Serve and Fear God all our days.”
Cool Terribly unconstitutional, but whatever.

“I miss the puritans every day and I cry of nostalgia just thinking of the times! Good old days!”
I am actually descended from one of the people on the Mayflower. They had fuck-all to do with the founding of America as a nation. Your grasp of history is close to your grasp of biology.

Sandy's threesome from SpingeBob

…What the actual f*ck!? Am I missing something here, or is this nutjob genuinely talking about a squirrel having a threesome!?

I read up about the Puritans after seeing "The Witch". Fun fact: rates of alcoholism were quite high because (a) hard cider was plentiful and (b) Puritanism was a tough life even for those times.

Not to mention the Godly people of Salem executed 15 women, 4 men, and a dog. Perhaps the good old days should be left in the past.

Is this a reboot of Elvis Is King?

like Sandy's threesome from SpingeBob

I don’t think we watched the same SpongeBob…

Even the Puritans knew Earth was a sphere. And there’s reasons why the Puritan settlers of NEw England witnessed several schisms.

Obviously, he’s watching the incredibly profane, copyright violating explicit parody SPANGBAB, in which Sandy lives under a perpetually ongoing threesome.

O B V I O U S L Y

As the only other explanation is that he’s so often searched for threesomes that his phone autocorrects TREEHOUSE to it.

Hey OP, your friendly reminder that the Puritans had premarital sex and got drunk on a regular basis, and only rarely burned witches :)

To this guy’s credit, however, he’s likely right in the fact that they didn’t have any threesomes with cartoon squirrels.

@Niam2020 #120316

As the only other explanation is that he’s so often searched for threesomes that his phone autocorrects TREEHOUSE to it.

Nonsense. Obviously, this is a dastardly plot by Big Tech to promote degeneracy! WAKE UP SHEEPLE!

With a name like that, I’m calling troll.

What kind of God creates Existence expressly so he can be feared? The servanthood is barely a blip compared to that.

The only hoax here is Ballbag's brain.

Quoth the Raven...

@shy #120309

Obviously, he wasn’t watching SpongeBob, he was watching a porn parody called SpingeBob.

@Vanto #120366

I was thinking more like SpoogeBob.

Have you never read anything about the Puritans? At the very least, you’d know that they were big on education. Also which Piritans because there was a variety of beliefs even among them.

<@Why?> #120318

The Godly Puritans of Salem hanged all their victims except for Giles Corey, who refused to enter a plea when he was accused.

Instead he was "pressed" to death, meaning they piled stones atop his prone body until he suffocated trying to get a plea from him.

Nobody knows how they convinced the dog to enter a plea.

Ball Earth is a Jesuit Hoax #fundie quora.com

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