Still, little do these “Reptillian invaders” know that I am part of a super-secret group of human initiates who are in covert contact with benevolent aliens! These “Forerunners” as they call themselves study earth on their own, of course, but also use us for a more subjective opinion on our world and species, and to have insiders to help make societal reforms.
Granted, I myself am not as important to earth as my fellow initiates, but I was chosen because I stumbled upon an ancient Isu Stargate left on earth, which transported me to a long-forgotten Star Forge on the exact opposite stellar orbit compared to earth. Because of that, the Star Forge’s AI recognized me as its new admin, and proceeded to construct a sun-blotting armada of Star Destroyers(*) crewed by androids for me to command! Most of this armada lies in wait in Alpha Centauri, ready to make an instant hyperjump to earth should I command it.
If these “Reptillians” dare to invade earth, they’d better bring enough firepower to surpass tens of thousands of warships if they want to succeed.
(*)Well, I am a Star Wars fan, and it was the first image the AI scanned from my mind to use as a template.
—
There, I can write crackpot fanfiction too.