Oh look, it’s the old “you can’t be bi unless you prove it beyond a doubt to meeeeeeeee!!!!!!” myth again!
I knew I was bi from the time I was a very little girl. I had crushes on boys and girls. I never said anything because I thought this was how everyone was. It was only when I started learning about sex in school that I realized there was a name for my experience. I also very quickly learned there is something “wrong” with it and I should hide those feelings in order make everyone else comfortable. When I was finally ok with who I was and started coming out to people, I ran into this very unhelpful sentiment a lot: “if you’ve never been with a woman you can’t say you’re bi”. At the time I hadn’t been with anyone so when they’d say this I’d respond with something like “if I said was straight would you act the same way?” To which they’d respond with some sort of muttered version of “well, that’s different.”
Then they try to “catch” you not being bi. I’m not sure what they’re looking for because I’m bi regardless of what I’m doing. If I’m dating a man, I’m still bi. If I’m dating a woman I’m still bi. If I’m eating lunch with friends or dinner with family I’m not out with, I’m still bi. If I’m doing round off back handsprings on top of a stoplight post, I’m still bi. Etc, etc, etc…
@Croquemitaine:
Lots of people think they get to decide bi people’s “real” orientation. It’s like they think what it actually means is undecided which it doesn’t, it’s an orientation all its own. People, including some in the LGBT community, expect us to “pick a side” like orientation is actually some kind of game or war.