kuyohashi

@kuyohashi

Shawntheimmortal942 #conspiracy #wingnut #pratt

These people are so divorced from reality they only get weekend visitations with the dog. If they also weren't a mob of disassociated, homicidal frum-monkeys, I'd almost weep for them.

Vijay Prozak #elitist

Methinks this one read Chaucer and sighed wistfully that he had been denied the right to toil on a mudfarm, marry at ten, catch dysentery from his well-slash-toilet, and die at the wizened old age of twenty-seven, surrounded by his two surviving children out of fourteen and his pox-besotted cousin-wife.

And yet literally absolutely nothing is stopping him and his luddite followers, however many he might have, from going off into the woods and playing Lord Of The Flies: The Home Game. We're not going with him, so why doesn't he just take his terminal camping trip and shut up about it already?

@Bastethotep #86844

Oh. Fictional. God. He's the fucking Emperor from Code Geass! Ruthless competition instead of equality, utilitarian eugenics, a disdain for those he arbitrarily deems “lesser than", it all fits.

“GloriousMartyrdom” / EmpathicDesign #sexist #homophobia #fundie

soulessdragon #homophobia

@Anon-e-moose #86797

I legitimately cackled like I had just gotten a new dalmation puppy-skin coat when I heard what Duggar got caught with. (I refuse to use his first name as it's also my brother's name. Fuck this mumple, he doesn't deserve my brother's name, I shall call him Vladislav.) It's horrible what he did, it's always horrible when he does things, but it tickles my schadenfreude just right when the "Moral Majority” gets caught with their figurative and literal pants down. Mummy and Dadsy can't send this creeper to a farm upstate to dodge consequences this time, can they? I hope he gets the Epstein Suite, with Bob Murray as his guard.

It won't mean a damn thing to the GQP monkeys, they'll wave their banner for these monsters right into the yawning abyss just for the dopamine tingle of pwning duh libs, but it's still so fucking nice to know how right we were about these scumbags.

Jerry Derecha/Adrenogate #crackpot #conspiracy #fundie #wingnut #magick

It looks like Winona Ryder walking down the aisle to marry Beetlejuice. But nah, it couldn't possibly be someone in a black dress with a veil, right? That's not even remotely possible; it simply must be something magical.

Varg Vikernes #conspiracy #elitist #racist

DEJAN #crackpot #wingnut

Anyone else remember the dad from My Big Fat Greek Wedding? Always made insane claims, like how every civilization and language could be reasonably traced back to Greek? Dunno why, but I got those vibes reading this demonstrable idiocy.

Thomas Sowell #racist #wingnut #pratt

Maybe conservative racists shouldn't have tacked on provisions that denied welfare to families with able-bodied yet unemployed men, thereby forcing black fathers who were consistently denied employment by racist asshole employers to leave the family home simply so their wives could claim welfare.

Nice of you to complain about a problem your side created, though. Shows you have enough self-awareness to recognize it as a bad thing, but not enough to feel bad about it.

Jim #sexist #dunning-kruger

Y'know, rather than restructure society to something Gilead would be aghast at, it is much easier to just shower, use deodorant, cut back on the Tab and Spicy Cheetohs, maybe get a temp job and a small apartment where your landlords aren't also your birth-givers. Try that before you start going full-on dystopic supervillain, hmm?

“GloriousMartyrdom” / EmpathicDesign #sexist #homophobia #fundie

D-did CKR actually come to the defense of the LGBTQ community as a whole and on principle? What in the name of sweet, glorious Bizarro-Earth? If so…*slow clap* good job, Bobby.

Citizen Donald Trump #conspiracy

@Malingspann #86097

Ugh, he’d be the one ghost even slimier than Onionhead.

Hey, I just heard about this shit - the folks in charge were caught bringing in blue-inked pens, which is a no-no because the tally machines can pick up blue ink. Seems like they were planning on "finding” some extra Trump ballots before a reporter nailed their fraudulent asses to the wall over this.

Kimberly L./James Rink #crackpot #conspiracy #magick #ufo

Man, some people hit 4⁄20 like fucking Chixulub. Are you supposed to cut your supply with drain cleaner?

Gloria Wyzgoski #wingnut #psycho

@checkmate #85919

My fucktard-to-English is a bit rusty, but I'll take a crack at this.

*ahem!*

“I hate myself, I hate other people, I like making other people suffer, I don't care if my country comes out looking worse for having this asshole in charge, so long as the people I hate suffer and my prejudices get aired in public and therefore validated. And as soon as I find whomever it was who shot me in the foot, I shall use this smoking gun I am currently holding to get my revenge.”

Or something approximating that, I'm not exactly fluent.

When the fucking Nixon administration - you know, the one that started the war on drugs specifically to hurt the black community - brings the full might of the Supreme Court on your racist ass for refusing to rent properties to black people, as they did with Donny Daughterdicker, then you know you done fucked up. Rather than doing the grown up thing, owning up to his oopsie-fuckles and learning from his mistakes to mature and become a better person, Annoying Orange instead doubles down and just keeps getting worse. He is entropic in all he does, never improving, only degrading.

Kaitlin Bennett #wingnut

Man, she just cannot help but shit her ideological pants, can she?

Feynman and Coulter's Love Child #homophobia #wingnut

Somebody tell this asshole about Alan Turing, I'm tired of seeing him on the internet. If he insists that gays have nothing to contribute to society despite their ickiness, then obviously he won't mind destroying all advanced telecommunications technology derived from Turing's work.

sun_wolf #conspiracy

If you know that Chauvin isn't guilty, why the fuck weren't you in court speaking for the defense? They could have really used you today, I bet. Now a racist fuckspittle's going to be kept on taxpayer dole for the next 75 years, or until someone remembers the shelf-life of pigs in stir.

As for the “bu’ he wuz on duh drugs!” narrative, not according to the actual, testified-in-court-for-the-prosecution coroner.

EzraLB #racist

So sorry your grandaddy didn't boink his sister, dude. Must be rough.

Wait until he figures out that before his family was Catholic, they were some variety of pagan, or maybe even completely Jewish. And won't it be fun when he figures out that a lot of his ancestors were
dundunDUNNNNNN black?

David Chase Taylor #crackpot #conspiracy #wingnut #dunning-kruger

So because Spielberg and Lucas thought a hidden submarine dock was a cool thing to put into their homage to nickelodeon adventure serials, that means the Nazi-CIA-Smurf cabal has one as well? I wonder what other secrets of the universe DJT gleans from movies. Does he think a secret society of sapient, singing lions currently lives at Pride Rock? Is he writing his congressman, warning them about Godzilla and this Palpatine person? What are his D&D sessions like?

matrix3912 #homophobia #transphobia #sexist

Then by all means, feel free to Galt yourself right out of society, because we ain't changing jack or shit just to suit your bigotries, dogfucker. We'll miss you, I'm sure the loss of your many important contributions shall be mourned, but either play nice with the other humans, or fuck off to the woods or something.

slipkid223 #racist #dunning-kruger

Even if Officer Oopsie did make an honest mistake in grabbing her firearm instead of her taser, no self-respecting police force should employ an officer who can't differentiate between a lightweight taser and a fucking heavy-ass loaded gun. The microt she lifted the gun from her holster, her mind should have clicked, “whoops, wrong thing, wouldn't want to fuck this pooch this badly!” and call a mulligan on her murder.

Frank T D’Anna #fundie #conspiracy

Bennett Lee Ross #crackpot #conspiracy #ufo #fundie #magick

Frank T D’Anna #fundie

@Jocasta #84990
Might I meet the merits of your mandate more to mete out justice both malicious and melodious, and without a mote of mercy. The mendacity of this moron makes my migraines magnitudes more malignant, by methodically maligning those not married to his mythology as mental midgets, while manifesting his own malfeasance in minimizing mortal morality outside his mediocre mythos. May a million muttering muskrats meander and march upon this muttonhead's manor during morning mealtime.

Dunno why I settled on the letter 'm.’ First thing I thought was ‘v,’ but…it’s been done.

John F. Kennedy via Erena Velazquez #crackpot #conspiracy #magick #wingnut #ufo

Things I have learned today:
1) Krypton, Melmac, and Planet Vegeta were all destroyed by masks.

We Were Born Free And No One Can’t Take That Away From Us.

Apparently Oswald's bullet took out the part of JFK's brain that retains grammatical accuracy.

3) Apparently, the only thing we need to do to thwart the Space Jews who run the universe like a Victorian misery-factory staffed by one-armed urchins with dirty faces is to stand up to them and in
a firm tone, assert, “Hey! Hey! Stop enslaving us and trying to blow up our planet! Knock it off!”

Monkey Religion #fundie #dunning-kruger

As opposed to “eternal time wizard wished the cosmos into creation, then made humans out of dead skin cells before there was either death or skin, then put an apple tree in front of hungry animals, told them to show some restraint, then pretended to be angry when they ate it like he fucking knew they would, then kicked back and watched the creations he ‘loved’ so much suffer and die, sometimes with him helping them shuffle off their mortal coils, until he knocked up an underaged girl without her consent, incarnated himself into a human wrapper, then let himself die to save the people he put in danger even though he had omnipotence anyways and didn't need to go through the whole rigmarole to start with, but did anyway because now he has fucking morons kissing his ass and calling him a hero two millennia later?”

I'll take science over that string of thought-cancer any day.

Michael Baxter #crackpot #conspiracy #wingnut

“And then GodKing Trump will track down Debbie Hawson, the snobby little bitch who turned me down in junior high, and force her to go to prom with me, and the football team will get stuffed into lockers, and my dad will finally be proud of me, and then I'll go for a ride in the car from Knight Rider! And everything will be wonderful someday!”

*Sigh!* These people are fucking exhausting.

Ryushin Malone #crackpot #ufo #conspiracy #racist

@Volcheka1 #84514

Obviously they mean that the death march is in the shape of Orion of New Genesis, son of dread Darkseid, warhound of Apokalips and master of the Astro Force. I just thought that was implicit.

Martin Luther King Jr. via Erena Velazquez #crackpot #conspiracy #fundie #magick

Iamnothere000 #psycho #sexist

guanoloco #homophobia #wingnut

@JeanP #83753

How do you leave Hubbard's Hilarious House of Hoodoo and yet still believe that alien ghosts make you do the evil? Did they just transition from getting their thetans measured to only having full-blown schizophrenia?

OT, speaking as someone with both crippling thalasso- and acrophobia, I promise that calling homophobes, “homophobes,” in no way, shape or form offends me. What does offend me is someone deigning to use me and others with phobias (you know, most of the human race) to defend their choice to be assholes. Why don't you go make like Saint Lafayette and pound rocks in the ocean. Maybe you'll do better than he did.

Fr. Frank Pavone #fundie #wingnut

Padre, the only way Dotard Dribbles could ever love you is if you put on an Ivanka wig and wore that slinky dress he likes so much. Otherwise, you're a just-barely useful idiot, and he already has Eric.

Anubis via Erena Velazquez #crackpot #ufo #magick #conspiracy #wingnut

@Skyknight #83314

Isn't Nephthys his mother, though?

Interesting that Anubis would use the Greek version of his name, rather than the proper, Egyptian Anpu. Almost like somebody who got their Egyptology degree from watching Scooby Doo cartoons and just started making up some Chariots of the Gods pigshit to grift money from delusion idiots and/or try to make themselves feel "speh-shull” or something.

Medeea Greere #crackpot #conspiracy #wingnut #psycho

Anyone else remember that jackass who wrote an actual for-sale novel about Obama's blubbering, tantrum-filled arrest for the capital offense of PWB? This is that, but with more peyote buttons.

Linus #psycho #sexist

Wouldn't it just be easier to, you know, work on yourself, you sad, sick fuck?

Henry Makow, PhD #crackpot #conspiracy #wingnut #sexist #homophobia #kinkshaming

Playboy never made you do literal jack shit, Makow. You had the propensity for objectification before you touched one glossy page, and the fact that you think women should be relegated solely to baby-chutes and sandwich presses only serves to show that you STILL objectify women.

Also, every time you demonize Jews, Jesus tosses another iron ingot onto Hell's furnace, warming it up for your bunghole when you finally get down there. That's his Momma you're talking about, fucker.

Peter B. Meyer #conspiracy #ufo #fundie #magick #crackpot

@Thraxas #82342

If they're capable of interplanetary travel, then it's likely they would be capable of nuclear fusion, in which case, they can just fucking manufacture gold without having to bother with enslaving anyone.

Also, this:

…long levity

So shit like this really is all just a big joke?

Varg Vikernes #crackpot #fundie #racist

Cool story, brah. Except that Odin viewed all humans are fit only to serve, he said as much during the hallucination sequences. Which, gotta be honest, I only finished post-game. Asgard, much like Odyssey's Atlantis DLC, was just a dull slog through an uninteresting-but-pretty locale full of people I didn't care to get to know.

Also, the whole thing with the Jotnar, that confused me. If the Aesir are Isu, and humans are humans, what the hell were the Jotnar? Were they a different clan of Isu? A different thing altogether? I mean, they must have been Isu, right? Since Hyrrokin turned out to be fucking Juno of all people, right? Gah, Assassin's Creed lore gives me cancer sometimes.

Anyway, dunno who this fuckmumple is, probably not anyone important, and fuck him, fuck his Odin, fuck his Bor, fuck his Aesir and Vanir, fuck his beliefs and fuck his lily-white inbred ass from here to Svartalfheim. I'm sure he'll love it there.

Brian Niemeier #wingnut #conspiracy #mammon #racist

Edward Smith #fundie #dunning-kruger

For what it's worth, the'd probably be more like seals, flopping about on flippers.

As for a “lack of knowledge of biology,” dolphins still have their fucking phalanges (finger bones). We know they used to be terrestrial, ffs.

Candace Owens #homophobia #sexist #dunning-kruger

Once again, Candace bitches about things nobody has ever said.

Craig R. Brittain #wingnut #psycho

I hope everybody buckled up, because that swerve could cause whiplash.

Michael Baxter #conspiracy #wingnut

Name: Mike Pence. Profession: Store Front Mannequin and milk enthusiast. Destination: Death Row, Gitmo. Mike Pence has been tried and convicted for doing his damned job and letting an election be certified in the winner's favour. But laws are made by men, carried out by men. And men are imperfect. Mike Pence is innocent. Proved guilty, what Mike Pence could not prove was that moments before saving democracy just by standing by like a goober, he encountered a man running from the reality that he was beaten by a guy from fucking Scranton. A man with orange skin. A man he had wished he had never seen before. A man who has not yet conceded his defeat. Mike Pence ponders his fate as he looks at the world for the last time. And sees only darkness. But in that darkness, fate moves its huge hand.

The Fugitive, a QM Production, starring Race Bannon as Mike Pence, an innocent victim of blind ignorance, falsely convicted for failing to fellate the god-emperor sufficiently, reprieved by fate when a train wreck of a presidency freed him en route to the political death house; freed him to hide in lonely desperation, to change his identity, to toil at many jobs; freed him to search for an orange-skinned man he saw leave the scene of the crime; freed him to run before the relentless pursuit of the QAnon shamans obsessed with his capture.

Michael Jackson via Erena Velazquez #crackpot #magick #conspiracy

Man, I wish my moral compass were broken, so I could scam money out of these morons.

“Hi there, I'm the ghost of Prince! Ignore the fat white guy I’m wearing, it's wash day. Man, I sure could use your PIN number, you know, to prevent the lizard people of Alpha Centauri Six from stealing humanity’s thoughts. Only with your donation can I purchase enough aluminum to cover the entire world and protect us all from evil space rays of indeterminate religious origins! Trump 2357!”

If only I didn't have that niggling little conscience keeping me from full-blown sociopathy, I'd be rolling in bank. Being good sucks.

PETA #psycho

Someone remind me again, how are these peons in any way, shape or form, “ethical?”

Bill Mitchell #wingnut #conspiracy

I'm not sure who Bill Mitchell is, but he sounds like an absolute cabbage.

James Rink #crackpot #conspiracy #ufo #magick

Benjamin Fulford #crackpot #conspiracy #racist #quack

Benjy Fulford would have been amazing at creating Saturday morning cartoons back in the 80's. He would have succumbed to a massive cocaine addiction by 1989 and his death would have been such a critical blow to the drug industry that Columbia would have to become a vassal state to the US just to survive, but he'd have been awesome while he was still alive.

OverwroughtDoeling #conspiracy #crackpot

@Creativerealms #81049

Granted, I've heard it's better than it has any right to be, certainly better than shit like An American Carol, the God’s Not Dead series or that one bit of fuckery Kevin Sorbo did about how the eeeeeeevil libruls took all the freedoms and now the only thing that can save ‘Murca is family, Jesus and guns. Still, however polished a turd might be, a turd it shall remain.

Fritz Berggren #fundie #racist #conspiracy #homophobia

Jesus’ mom was the Nazarene bicycle who slam-fucked every slave at the drunken barn dance and couldn't tell you who her babydaddy was if her life depended on it. Out of sheer mind-breaking panic, she concocted a bullshit story about angels and divine proclamations, knowing that her geriatric husband was just barely literate enough to comprehend language and would believe her bullshit, thereby sparing her a post-natal stoning. In order to complete the ruse, she raised the child in the lie, thereby warping him into actually thinking he was some sort of Bronze-Aged superhero. He had managed to get just enough education to be charismatic, and like any good cult leader, accrued followers; however, his insanity threatened to bring the wrath of Rome down upon the Jewish vassal states, and in order to prevent the Legate's massacre of the Israelites, the Pharisees had Jesus handed over to Pilate for execution, which Pilate did. And then Jesus stayed dead because he was just the crazy son of a whore, and not actually magic.

Is that offensive?

OverwroughtDoeling #conspiracy #crackpot

Ben Shapiro made Die Hard in High School and it was nothing more than Second Amendment fellatio about how the only real solution to gun violence was more gun violence. Face it, even the MCu is more rooted in reality than anything the GOP could come up with. But then again, they aren't the most imaginative lot in the first place, are they?