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Since our Leftist media seem anxious to have a conversation about theology, I say we oblige. This week in their trolling of Wisconsin Gov. Scott Walker presents a panel discussion on whether or not President Barack Hussein Obama really is a Christian.

Although Mr. Walker is the son of a Baptist preacher, the Republican is not the most qualified individual to determine who is and isn’t a Christian. The “good news” (pardon the pun) is I know someone who is.

Even better, he’s very much alive and kicking as we speak. And he’s so eager for his opinion to be known on such matters that he preserved a written record of all his thoughts and deeds, which has become the greatest best-seller in history.

Who is more qualified to consult on who is and isn’t a Christian than Jesus Christ?

When I asked him what he thought, Jesus made it quite clear that President Obama is not a Christian. And he was also kind enough to give me some quotes I could pass on to ya’ll.

“I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.” (John 14:6)

Mr. Obama has referred to Islam’s Koran as “holy” (which means a state of completeness/perfection set apart from the sinfulness of man), and Muhammad as a “prophet” (which means truth-teller).

However, on the most important point of them all Islam and Christianity contradict each other. Islam teaches that Jesus wasn’t even crucified, which means he wasn’t resurrected. But the Bible teaches there is no Christianity without the crucifixion and resurrection (or what Christians celebrate on Good Friday and Easter). These are irreconcilable views. So right away these two religions are incompatible, and at least one of them is lying.

Christianity and Islam could both be false, but they can’t both be true. No sincere Christian would elevate something that distorts and diminishes the fundamental moment of Christianity as “holy.” Nor would they bestow the title of “prophet” upon someone who has spread a false message about Christ.

“Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven.” (Matthew 7:21)

Just because someone claims to be a Christian doesn’t mean they are one. It’s not like Mr. Obama would be the first politician to claim to be something he’s not.

“Why do you call me ‘Lord, Lord’ and you do not do what I say?” (Luke 6:46)

Jesus commands us not to lie, yet Mr. Obama has lied repeatedly (“if you like your current health care plan you can keep it,” as just one example). Jesus commands us not to murder, yet Mr. Obama is the most pro-murder president we have ever had (including voting against a bill to protect babies who survive abortions while in the Illinois State Legislature). Jesus says marriage is between a man and a woman, and we are created male and female. Yet Mr. Obama promotes redefining marriage and so-called transgenderism.

“A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another.” (John 13:34)

Jesus gave this commandment to his followers, yet under Mr. Obama we see Christians consistently targeted for their beliefs (Hobby Lobby, Chick-fil-a, Little Sisters of the Poor, military personnel, and numerous other Christians who refuse to comply with Obama-imposed immorality). Why would a president who’s a Christian use his power to consistently target other Christians?

“For whoever is ashamed of me and of my words, of him will the Son of Man be ashamed when he comes in his glory and the glory of the Father and of the holy angels.” (Luke 9:26)

From excluding references to Christ on the official White House Christmas card, to referring to Jesus as “a son of God” (when Jesus claimed he was the only son of God), Mr. Obama has gone out of his way on numerous occasions to deny the supremacy of Christ. What kind of Christian would deny the power and glory of his own savior?

“So faith comes from hearing, and hearing through the word of Christ.” (Romans 10:17)

Mr. Obama‘ spiritual mentor, the Rev. Jeremiah Wright, was Mr. Obama’s pastor for 20 years. He baptized Mr. Obama and his daughters, and officiated his wedding to the first lady. Through the years, Mr. Wright taught many things from his pulpit like anti-Semitism, black liberation theology, racism, conspiracy theory, and Marxism.

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Jesus says sincere faith comes only by the hearing of his words. With Mr. Wright preaching nearly everything but Jesus‘ actual words, how could Mr. Obama come to sincere faith in such a church?

“Watch out for false prophets. They come to you in sheep’s clothing, but inwardly they are ferocious wolves. By their fruit you will recognize them. Do people pick grapes from thorn bushes, or figs from thistles? Likewise, every good tree bears good fruit, but a bad tree bears bad fruit. A good tree cannot bear bad fruit, and a bad tree cannot bear good fruit. Every tree that does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire. Thus, by their fruit you will recognize them.” (Matthew 7:15-20)

Given everything you’ve already read, would you say Mr. Obama’s tree bears good fruit or bad fruit? Besides, I’m mystified as to why our Leftist media, which bows at the altar of secularism, is so concerned about Mr. Obama’s religion? Unless they’re hoping to re-brand Christianity in Mr. Obama’s Marxist image.

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For now my work here is finished. On the other hand, the work of God-haters who will viciously demagogue what I just wrote, without supplying any rational basis for their assertions there’s anything remotely Christian about Obama (thus proving my point), I’m sure is just beginning. Why the same Leftists who vehemently loathe Christianity want their progressive hero to be labeled a Christian is beyond me. Regardless, Jesus has a final word for them as well:

“Do not fear those who kill the body but are unable to kill the soul, but rather fear Him who is able to destroy both soul and body in Hell.” (Matthew 10:28)

The Magical Land of Progressitopia

There once was a land, a magical land, with a chicken in every pot. And in this land, which was called Progressitopia, there were two peoples. There were those who saw the world as it was, and there were those who saw the world as they oh-so-very-much wished it could be. The former were called the Trads, and the latter, the Progs. It was the Progs who held dominion over this great land, and so it was they who wrote, or re-wrote, her history.

Now, in this kingdom we must remember that Christianity, or “Christianism” as it would later be called (long since forbidden), along with similar such mythological and dogmatic phantasms, remained the foremost, if not the sole, thorn in the Progs’ collectivist butt. Any and all thought or practice that might, in any way, undermine full realization of, and strict adherence to, progressive thinking was, therefore, strictly verboten.

In fact, the Trads, the traditionalist remnant, had proven singularly responsible for the famines, Civil War II and Progressitopia’s endlessly spiraling state of affairs, both foreign and domestic – a state that, notwithstanding all predictions to the contrary, somehow became significantly and enigmatically worse subsequent to the onset of progressive governance.

There was, however, one exception to this rule: Islam. Shadowing the glorious dawn of progressive reign came, from o’er the sea, a mighty and fearsome caliphate. The Muslim faith spread like wildfire. Recruitment efforts were buoyed, and appreciably so, in that, while yet a loving and peaceful religion, any skeptic or “infidel” who failed to convert was either immediately raped and enslaved or summarily beheaded, stoned, shot or blown limb-from-limb.

Whereas Progressitopians, with their one-child-only abortion mandate, stopped reproducing altogether, adherents to the religion of peace rutted like rabbits. Every corner of the globe became thickly populated by devotees of the most praised Prophet Muhammad – peace be upon him.

As global violence and jihad spiked, it seemed for a time that Progressitopia and the Islamic caliphate would be one another’s undoing.

And then something extraordinary happened.

The King of Progressitopia, a brave and handsome man most wise, with visor of gold and scepter of 3-iron in hand, bowed before the great caliph and presented a series of official mea culpas on behalf of his land. He prayed Allah’s forgiveness for incurring his wrath – just desserts for centuries of Progressitopian Imperialism.

And so these two seemingly incompatible kingdoms, with wholly polarized worldviews, agreed to forge an incongruous socio-political partnership – an “Islamo-Progressive Alliance.” The alliance was built upon the maxim: “The enemy of my enemy is my friend.” The common enemy, of course, had formed its own unholy alliance: the “Zio-Christian Axis of Evil.”

And so it soon came to pass that independent Islamic settlements cropped-up throughout Progressitopia. The Michganistan Territory became, for all intents and purposes, Mecca to the Western Hemisphere.

Presently, the Islamo-Progressive Alliance found itself enjoying a comparatively peaceful seven-year truce. Apart from a weekly handful of suicide bombings, mass shootings and random beheadings, carried out chiefly against Progressitopia’s women and children, things were simply capital.

But then, trouble in paradise – economic turmoil. Toward the middle of the new millennium’s third decade, Progressitopia’s national debt ballooned to over 60 trillion. For many years, Trad economists and “debt alarmists” had warned that Progressitopia’s skyrocketing debt and deficits were unsustainable. These anti-progressive thinkers openly questioned the progressive strategy of taxing and spending one’s way to prosperity.

They felt, irrationally so, that such approach represented, as one provocative naysayer phrased it, “an epically stupid and patently impossible self-contradiction. No more can one spend his way out of debt than can he cheat his way out of adultery.”

Another fundamentalist cynic offered a less hurtful, yet no less sensationalist analogy: “When a bridge’s infrastructure becomes unsustainable,” he alleged, “it will ultimately collapse if its integrity is compromised to the degree that it can no longer support some burgeoning mass. So too it goes, apparently, as relates integrity to politicians, governments and national debt.”

Right-wing propaganda aside, Progressitopia’s economy did, nonetheless, unexpectedly collapse for reasons ultimately deemed inconclusive.

Now, as heretofore told, and as go the history books, Christianism had, from time immemorial, been the very bane of free-thinking humanity’s existence. This hateful mythology had been largely to blame, in concert with its sister-faith, Judaism, and its insufferable cousin, conservatism, an equally curious mental disorder, for all of the world’s wars, slavery, racism, sexism, disease, capitalism, global warming and, most onerously perhaps, gluten sensitivity.

Moreover, both Christianism and conservatism were ultimately determined to have been the catalyst for the systemic phobia outbreak that inexplicably began around the turn of the century. First there was homophobia, an irrational, chronic and debilitating fear of the square-hole-round-peg people, or, as this flamboyant troupe, so enamored with acronymic wordplay, preferred to be called: the “SHRP community.” Since SHRPs displayed impeccable fashion sense and a flair for the fabulous, Neanderthalic Trads were, most naturally, terrified by them.

Then came Islamophobia, the irrational fear of having one’s head lopped off, followed by transphobia, the fear of naked men in ladies’ locker rooms, polyphobia, the fear of communal rompathons, as well as an all-inclusive litany of other phobias relating to myriad sexual orientations, gender identities and expressions.

Next, there emerged the great progressiphobia pandemic of ’27. This involved an equally absurd, though no less universal, fear of progressive thought, practice or people. This, for a time, threatened to halt Progressitopia’s progressing progress altogether.

Finally, there occurred a worldwide outbreak of phobia-phobia. This was, of course, a condition delineated by the once again irrational denial that any of the aforementioned phobias had “any basis in reality whatsoever,” but, rather, were “simply ham-fisted pejoratives intended to marginalize one’s political opposition.”

But, alas, we must for now part ways. My gluten-free frittata grows cold.